Growing up, we often hear our parents say, "It's all for your own good." However, behind this sentence, sometimes a more complex emotion is hidden - vanity. From school results to competition in the workplace to comparisons with their children after retirement, parents always seem to be measuring us with an invisible ruler.
When I was in school: "Look at Xiao Ming next door, I won the first place in this exam." We are expected to be the best in the eyes of others, as if only our achievements can prove our worth. Parental expectations turn into stress and make us lose ourselves in books and test papers. They want us to excel academically, not only for our future, but also to satisfy their psychology of comparing themselves to others. This expectation, though motivated by love, often places a heavy burden on us.
At work: "Your Uncle Li's son is now working in a large company with a monthly salary of tens of thousands." We are pushed into the workplace, as if only high salaries and status can win the approval of our parents. Our dreams and interests seem to have become less important. Parents want us to succeed in the workplace so they can look up in front of friends and family. They believe that only in this way can we live a happy life. However, they ignore the true desires and pursuits of our hearts.
When retired: "Your Aunt Wang's daughter married a good family, and now she lives happily." Our marriage and family have also become the object of comparison between our parents. It seems that only a perfect family life can make parents feel satisfied. They expect us to be able to have a happy family so that they don't have to worry about our future. However, they may not realize how much stress and pain this comparison can cause us.
Dear parents, have you ever wondered what we really need? Is it constant comparison and competition, or understanding and support? What we aspire to be a success in the eyes of others is not to be a success in the eyes of others, but to be the pride of your hearts. We want to be able to gain your understanding and support, rather than being constantly compared to others.
Love should not be a burden. Let's let go of those meaningless comparisons, use understanding and support, and write our own wonderful life together. Because in this complex world, the most precious thing is not the result of comparison, but the unconditional love and support.
As a parent, you should realize that every child is a unique individual with their own dreams, interests, and pursuits. It is the responsibility of parents to guide them to grow up healthy and help them discover their potential, not to mold them into the ideal image they have in mind. When we let go of our high expectations and unreasonable comparisons for our children, we will find that the happiness and fulfillment in life are actually all around us.
Epilogue:
In this uncertain world, the only constant is our love for our children. Let us use this love to understand them, support them, and accompany them through every stage of life. Let's remember that love is not a competition, but a companionship. When we treat our children with unconditional love and understanding, we are pleasantly surprised to find that their life path becomes broader and more exciting as a result. And all of this stems from our deep love for them and respect for their unique personalities.
There are still many deficiencies in my work, please review my work, and ask you to correct and supplement.
(Disclaimer) The process and pictures described in this article are from the Internet, aiming to spread positive energy, and there is no vulgar and other bad guidance. If copyright or infringement of the rights and interests of others is involved, please contact me in time, and I will delete the relevant content immediately!
If you have any questions about this article, please feel free to contact me to delete or modify it!
If you like my articles, please click "Follow", and you will receive the article push as soon as you become a fan. Thank you again for your support!