Li Ermao was born in a poor rural family, he should have had a warm and harmonious childhood, but due to his father's illegal crimes, their family fell into a difficult situation.
His father was imprisoned for a crime and eventually lost his life in prison, a tragedy that left a permanent shadow on Li Ermao's family and completely changed the trajectory of his life.
The mother suffered the double blow of her husband's imprisonment and death, unable to face the strange eyes of the people around her and the weight of life, and finally chose to remarry. This decision gave her a new life, but it also made the young Li Ermao lose her last support and become a real "wild child".
Since then, Li Ermao has been dubbed a "wild child", which has made him feel deeply inferior and angry at the fingers of his peers and adults. He longs to be accepted and loved, but he can only lick his wounds alone in a lonely world.
Whenever he heard others mention that his father was a "criminal", Li Ermao would feel embarrassed, and his heart was full of indescribable pain and suffering.
The dark experience of childhood planted the seeds of inferiority and rebellion in Li Ermao's heart, and the absence of his parents made him have obvious personality defects in his upbringing, he became sensitive, suspicious, and wary of the world around him.
He tries to heal his childhood trauma, but finds that he can't fill the hole in his heart.
In such an environment, Li Ermao can't even guarantee a basic life. He often went hungry, lived a life without a meal, and hunger often accompanied him. The extreme lack of material resources made his psychological trauma even more serious.
Li Ermao began to doubt his own worth, feeling like an insignificant ant that could not find his place in this cold world.
Despite the hardships of life, Li Ermao's hopes have never been completely extinguished. He still aspires to change his destiny, get rid of the label of "wild child", and win the respect and recognition of others.
This firm determination not only became the driving force for him to continue to move forward, but also laid the groundwork for his later life choices.
The pressure of life made Li Ermao have to drop out of school early to enter society and make a living on his own. However, fate seems to compensate him with something - he has feminine characteristics. Although the body is slender and beautiful, even more beautiful than some women.
In particular, his thin waist, which looks both attractive and attractive, has become a foreshadowing of the turning point in Li Ermao's life in the future.
By chance, Li Ermao came into contact with the profession of dancer, and when he stood on the stage for the first time, the fire in his heart was ignited. The applause and cheers of the audience gave him his first experience of being appreciated and needed.
Here, he is no longer the "wild child" who is discriminated against, but a radiant protagonist.
The stage is Li Ermao's safe haven, and only when he puts on women's clothes, puts on makeup, and acts in a feminine way, can he truly feel his inner self. In this dreamlike world of light, shadow and music, Li Ermao regained his long-lost respect and sense of self-fulfillment.
It was an experience he had never had before, and he found that he also had value and could be liked by others.
However, the reality is quite harsh. Despite his popularity on stage, Li Ermao faced all kinds of doubts and ridicule in real life. Words such as "no man, no ghost or ghost", "man not man, woman not woman" and other words pierced his fragile heart like a sharp blade.
There were people who didn't understand his identity, and some people hated him because they were jealous of the high salary he earned by working in a nightclub.
However, these objections instead inspired Li Ermao's determination - he wanted to be a real woman. On stage, he put on a woman's costume, put on a woman's makeup, and imitated the woman's movements, making him feel freedom and happiness that he had never felt before.
The feeling was so strong that he began to have a strong idea – he wanted to really be a woman.
With the development of his career, Li Ermao's economic situation has been significantly improved. He no longer worries about the trivial things of life, which gives him more energy to think about identity.
Every successful performance and the praise he received strengthened his determination to become a woman, and he hoped to achieve his dream of becoming a real woman by being transgender.
Under the spotlight of the stage and the cheers of the audience, Li Ermao gradually found his life direction. He decided to fight for his dream and was willing to give everything for it, even if the road was full of hardships and unknowns.
The stage has become the starting point of Li Ermao's transformation, and it is also the beginning of his self-discovery and realization of his dreams.
Li Ermao made up her mind to undergo sex reassignment surgery and become a real woman. This decision requires not only great courage, but also a lot of money. In order to realize this dream, Li Ermao began to work frantically and work hard to save money.
He knew that this was his only chance to truly unify his body with his heart.
In this process, Li Ermao undertook unimaginable hardships. During the day, he has to endure physical and mental inconsistency, and at night he has to show his best side on stage.
Even when he is exhausted, he never slackens, because every penny is one step closer to his dream.
In order to save expenses, Li Ermao carefully saved all his income, almost gave up all the enjoyments in life, and put all his energy into work. On stage, he performed harder, hoping to win more applause and a generous bounty.
However, Li Ermao's transformation was not all smooth sailing, and he had to endure the strange eyes of others, and endure countless doubts and ridicule. Someone didn't understand his choice, someone laughed at his dreams, but none of this could shake his determination.
Whenever he encounters a setback, he will remember his original intention and continue to persevere.
Finally, Li Ermao saved enough for the operation after several years of hard work. At that moment on the operating table, he was both nervous and happy. He knew that from now on, he would face the world with a new identity.
The result of the operation was very successful, and Li Ermao finally became a real woman. When he looked in the mirror for the first time as a woman, the joy in his heart almost overwhelmed him.
He felt like he had been born again, even though the pain of the past had become worth it.
However, Li Ermao did not know that this sex reassignment surgery was just a turning point in his life journey, and more challenges awaited him. Although the surgery changed his biological sex, it will take some time for society to recognize and accept him.
Even so, at this moment, Li Ermao is still immersed in the joy of realizing his dreams and is full of expectations for the future.
After the completion of sex reassignment surgery, Li Ermao was full of longing for love. She longs to find someone who loves her dearly to make up for her long-standing emptiness and loneliness. Soon after, she met her first boyfriend.
This man is considerate and gentle on the surface, but in fact he has ulterior motives. He didn't take a fancy to Li Ermao, but the money she had worked so hard to accumulate. However, Li Ermao, who was blinded by love, was unaware.
She poured all her sincerity into this relationship, met all the requirements of her boyfriend, and even if she knew that some of the requests were excessive, she would grit her teeth and agree.
Li Ermao's boyfriend often tricks her into spending money on things, and although she knows in her heart that this may be a trap, she is too eager to be loved, and she will still meet his requirements every time. She is willing to give everything to maintain the relationship.
Until one day, Li Ermao heard that she could make a lot of money in business, so she invested all her savings. However, it backfired, and not only did she not make any money, but she lost all her money. When she lost her financial resources, her once sweet-talking boyfriend abandoned her mercilessly.
This blow made Li Ermao heartbroken, but she did not give up the pursuit of love because of it. Soon after, she met her second boyfriend, and for her, this time she longed for a stable relationship even more.
When she returned to her hometown with her boyfriend, she hoped to live an ordinary and happy life.
However, reality once again punched her hard and gave them a slap in the face. In that isolated town, the relationship between the two soon became a topic of conversation after dinner.
Gossip is like an invisible sword, tormenting the lovers day after day, making them deeply troubled, and everyone in the town cannot accept Li Ermao's identity, and is full of prejudice and discrimination against this relationship.
Under huge social pressure, Li Ermao's second boyfriend finally chose to leave. He couldn't bear the strange eyes and gossip from all around him, and at the same time, he couldn't fully accept Li Ermao's past.
This relationship disappeared quietly under the complicated discussions of others, leaving Li Ermao alone and having to face the cruel reality alone.
After experiencing two emotional failures, Li Ermao almost lost his confidence in love. She began to wonder if people like her were not worthy of sincere affection, whether they were destined to die alone.
These questions hung over her like a haze, making her feel more hopeless than ever.
Li Ermao began to reflect on her choice, she paid a lot for love, and even changed her body, but in exchange for betrayal and hurt again and again.
Such deep disappointment and heartache made her feel confused and fearful about the future, and the beautiful love she once longed for is now only full of devastated memories.
The repeated setbacks of her feelings caused great trauma to Li Ermao's soul and almost destroyed her entire life. She once shone on the stage, but now she is only exhausted and disheartened.
The Li Ermao, who struggled for his dreams and was full of hope, seemed to have disappeared, and was replaced by a lost soul.
Li Ermao lost her financial resources and emotional sustenance, and her life fell into trouble. She had tried to make a comeback, but each attempt seemed to remind her of her past failures.
Li Ermao, who was once full of hopes and dreams, is now only an empty shell.
The weight of life made her feel hard to breathe and she began to question her past choices: Was sex reassignment surgery really worth it? After paying so much, how can you get such a result? The dreams and hopes that once supported her have now become a weapon to ridicule her.
Li Ermao felt unprecedented loneliness and despair, she began to close herself, no longer trusted anyone, and no longer had hope for the future. The "she" who once shone on the stage is now only a lost soul, struggling to survive on the edge of life.
This deep disappointment and heartache made Li Ermao full of confusion and fear about the future. She begins to doubt her own worth, feeling like the "wild child" of the past, who has no one to care about and nowhere to go in this world.
Li Ermao's situation reminds people of Lu Xun's famous saying: "Mourn its misfortune and be angry with it." However, she has lost the strength to continue to "fight". Her life is like an absurd tragedy, and every scene is full of helplessness and sadness.
At this stage, Li Ermao has completely fallen into a state of self-abandonment. She began to care no longer about her appearance, no longer pursued career development, and even the most basic life was difficult to maintain.
Once upon a time, she was a dancer who worked hard for her dreams, but now she is a poor person who survives under the weight of life.
Fate always seems to not let go of Li Ermao. She thought her life had hit rock bottom, but even bigger blows followed. Complications after sex reassignment surgery have deteriorated Li Ermao's physical condition.
However, due to the loss of financial resources, she could not even afford the necessary medical expenses.
In a dilapidated rental house, Li Ermao was alone in the last days of his life. Without the company of loved ones, without the condolences of friends, not even a person who can speak.
She lay quietly on the bed, looking back on her life.
Li Ermao's life experience can be described as tragic and absurd, from a "wild child" who gave up on himself due to lack of parental care since he was a child, to a brilliant dancer on the stage, to a transgender person who bravely pursued himself, and finally became a poor person who was hurt by love.
Every scene is full of helplessness and sadness.
Did Li Ermao regret his choice at the end of his life? Do you hold a grudge against the world? We have no way of knowing. We only know that on an ordinary day, this soul who has experienced vicissitudes of life has completed its life journey in loneliness.
When people found Li Ermao, it was too late. Her story has been compiled into an embarrassing urban legend, which makes people reflect: In this world, how many people like Li Ermao are silently suffering unimaginably for ordinary people? .
Li Ermao's death is not only the disappearance of individual life, but also a silent social accusation. Her story reminds us that everyone should be respected and understood, regardless of who they are and what choices they make.
Perhaps, only when we learn to care and accept can we prevent more unexpected tragedies.