In the program "Round Table Pie", Dou Wentao once shared a sentence from Master Mengshen:
"Be merciful to all beings, but first be merciful to yourself and let yourself go."
Life won't be exactly as it should be.
There is always something that makes people feel powerless, there are always close friends drifting away, and there is always lingering gossip.
Many people will be confined to loss and grief because of this, and they will never recover.
Flowers bloom and give birth to two sides, and the joy of life is often in one thought.
To learn to let go of oneself is to choose to use a positive gaze to see the flowers bloom everywhere.
The powerless dilemma, smiled and bowed his head
I once saw a netizen ask a question on the Internet:
"Which of the two options would you choose, holding on or bowing your head with a smile?"
Here's a thought-provoking answer:
"I choose to smile and bow my head, and to stop in the wrong direction is to move forward."
There are always some things that we can't solve even if we try our best, as if we are walking on a Möbius ring and never have an exit.
In the face of this situation, instead of holding on to embarrass yourself, it is better to bow to reality with a smile, turn a corner to avoid the dilemma, and achieve life in a new attempt.
A few years ago, shared bicycles were popular on the streets, and the two industry giants, Mobike and ofo, were even more sought after.
However, as more and more competitors poured into the market, the heat of the bicycle economy began to cool, and the scale of investment on the capital side tightened.
After the prosperity faded, enterprises in the industry have faced the dilemma of increasing financing difficulties and breaking the capital chain.
Mobike and Ofo also made completely different choices at this juncture.
Hu Weiwei, the founder of Mobike, predicted that the general trend was gone, so she defied public opinion, took advantage of the last east wind, sold Mobike to Meituan at a high price, and withdrew.
And her competitor, Dai Wei, the founder of ofo, has repeatedly rejected good opportunities to be acquired, even though the company has been riddled with holes, she still insists on moving forward.
As a result, it is well known that ofo not only owes money to the capital, but also fails to return billions of user deposits on time.
Dai Wei disappeared with the reputation of "old lai", while Hu Weiwei landed safely with billions of cash.
The famous psychologist Yakos said:
"90% of the misfortunes in life are because of unwillingness, which is the reason why many people don't know how to stop losses in time."
There is no shortage of people in this world who persevere to the end, but fate often depends on those wise men who know how to smile and bow their heads and turn in time.
Indeed, smiling and bowing your head is a kind of sobriety, which not only allows you to put down your face, does not embarrass yourself, but also bears your responsibilities and knows how to judge the situation.
There is not only one road in life, when the road does not turn, people turn, since you do your best to turn in place, you might as well turn the direction in time and look for opportunities in the new track.
In the final analysis, bowing your head in a difficult situation is to leave more possibilities to your future self.
Frequencies of different souls, gracefully turned
In the book "To Friends Who Are Drifting Away", the author mentions the concept of "former friends".
These "former friends" may be Fa Xiao who grew up together, or they may be book friends they met in the library, or they may be "you" at the same table.
They once gave us a touch of warm memories in our lives, but eventually disappeared into the sea of people with the pace of life.
Netizen @小洛 once shared the story between himself and his "ex-friend" on social platforms.
Soon after entering the freshman year, Xiao Luo met his classmate Huihui in club activities, and the two quickly became close friends due to their common hobbies.
During the four years of college, the two visited the store together, went shopping together, and accompanied each other, and the best memories of the green years were given to each other.
After graduating from university, Xiaoluo joined a local state-owned enterprise, while Huihui applied for a job in a Fortune 500 foreign company in Shanghai with her outstanding personal ability.
In the first year or two of the job, the two still maintained high-frequency contact, talking about everything as they did in college.
But as time goes by, I don't know if it's because the life circles have become different, and the concepts of the two have slowly deviated.
For example, Xiao Luo despises the intrigue of professional life, and just wants to do the work at hand every day and devote more energy to personal hobbies;
But Huihui believes that this is a sign of short-sightedness, and if you want to have a good life, you must dare to fight for it at work, and you must be willing to sacrifice rest time.
Later, there were more and more such contradictions, and both of them felt that the other was gradually becoming strangers.
Although they have tried to bring each other closer, whenever it comes to the discussion of life choices, conflicts will immediately surface.
Finally, one day, when Xiao Luo inadvertently flipped through his mobile phone, he found that the recent chat records of the two were still stuck on the painless meal greetings half a year ago.
Only then did I realize that my once intimate best friend may have been lost in the sea of people.
As there is a sentence in "Human Disqualification":
"Encounters are always unprepared, and partings are all planned for a long time."
The gradual drift of adults is often not because of conflicts between each other, but because the frequency of life is not the same.
As life no longer intersects, barely maintained friendships will eventually become fragile, and separation will become inevitable.
Therefore, there is no need to feel nostalgic, let alone forced, the fate of different frequencies is like a catastrophe, and only by learning to let go of attachment can we cultivate to become a higher self.
When you choose to turn gracefully and leave your blessings to others, you also choose to plant expectations in your heart.
There is a long road ahead, and you will meet souls of similar frequency.
The sound of the decibel level is too high, and the ears are tightly covered
I still remember that when the Year of the Rabbit stamp was newly issued, Mr. Huang Yongyu, as the creator, was pushed to the forefront.
Some say the blue rabbit is "too weird" and "a messenger of hell", while others say it reminds him of "the shadow of his childhood".
In fact, this is not the first time Mr. Huang has been scolded, his paintings are full of whimsical and whimsical, but they are out of the public aesthetic.
Previously, some people criticized his Chinese paintings for being unorganized and not being considered Chinese paintings at all.
Huang Lao wittily responded:
"If anyone says that my paintings have a national style, I will sue him."
Immediately afterwards, some professionals in the painting world also jumped out to denounce the old man, believing that his exaggerated style was to cover up the weakness of his basic painting skills.
Unexpectedly, Huang Lao was also not angry, but accepted all the comments:
"I didn't study Chinese painting or Western painting, so I painted in my own way."
In fact, if you have seen the old man's early works, you will definitely be amazed at the depth of his pen skills, and it is by no means in vain.
But this nearly 100-year-old man has never explained or pandered, even if his works have experienced criticism of positions, they have been coerced by waves of criticism.
But he himself has always been consistent, using my pen to draw my heart, and insisting on his own way of painting and creation.
It is conceivable that if Huang Lao is shaken in the slightest, the title of "ghost talent" in the painting world may have long been reduced to an empty name.
However, in life, there are too few people who know how to block out external noise and dare to fulfill themselves.
Most of the time, we are reluctant to let go of ourselves, and we want to move with our hearts while longing for the approval of others.
I've seen a heart-piercing sentence:
"If you're bent on something, don't start by listening to the outside world."
Life is our own, and the voice navigation of others can never take us where we want to go.
The more you are in the unexpected world, the more you will ignore the whispers in your heart, and the more and more interference will be, and the direction of your life will only gradually deviate.
Only by learning to cover your ears tightly can you return to your heart from other people's mouths, and only where your heart desires is what you want to do, and you can finally return to what you want.
In this life, the most difficult thing is not to become someone else, but to become yourself.
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Teacher Mai once said:
"There is nowhere to escape in life, only to shake hands and make peace.
This is the accumulation of life, and it is also a portrayal of the ups and downs of life. ”
In the sea of life, most of the unhappiness experienced is because of the unwillingness to let go of oneself.
The dilemma of powerlessness, unwilling to bypass;
souls of different frequencies, reluctant to turn around;
Sound with too high decibels, reluctant to block out.
It is precisely because life is not easy that we must learn to break free from the difficulties little by little, have hope, and walk in the light.
For the rest of your life, you might as well try to hide the previous unhappiness behind you, give yourself the beauty after that, and forget and follow the wind, with hot dreams, and go to every mountain and sea.
Source: There are books