In this Internet era, how many couples' married life is like a show in a variety show, glamorous on the surface, but in fact there is a hidden crisis, today, let's talk about those things between He Yuxin and her husband "Brother Monkey", the two have been married for two years, but life is full of many cracks, which also reminds me of the similar troubles faced by many middle-aged couples around us, what is marriage? Is it a marriage letter or a lifetime commitment?
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Do you think that the beginning of many marriage stories is so beautiful, just like a fairy tale plot, He Yuxin and "Brother Monkey" are also, sweet and abnormal when they are in love, they are often envied, and they enter the life of marriage, but it is not as imagined, she revealed that Brother Monkey is always reluctant to go home and does not want children, which makes her very heartbroken.
Let's take a look from He Yuxin's perspective, what is the initial sweetness of the two, the feeling of first love is always desirable, the two parties work hard for each other, and look forward to a happy life in the future, but when the veil of marriage is lifted, the reality often catches people off guard, no longer a sweet date, but a day after day of firewood, rice, oil and salt, the distance between He Yuxin and "Brother Monkey" is gradually being pulled farther and farther away by the trivial things of life
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Now "Brother Monkey", more time is spent in work and socializing, and there is only a handful of time to go home, while He Yuxin feels endless loneliness and helplessness at home, and the future she once looked forward to has now become an endless wait, this situation makes her more and more depressed and often thinks alone: What happened? Are your efforts in vain?
Many people may sigh silently when they see what happened to her: this is not a case, the lives of middle-aged couples seem to be full of similar troubles, how many men are unwilling to go home or participate in family life after going out to work? It's not that these men don't love their families, they just are under all kinds of pressure, and they choose to escape when facing reality, middle-aged men certainly have their own difficulties: career bottlenecks, family responsibilities, heavy social pressure make them feel tired, and even want to escape
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Maybe you also have friends or relatives who have experienced similar marital troubles, and you can always hear the complaints of your wives during dinner: your husband only knows how to play with his mobile phone and does not help with housework
He Yuxin's pain comes from this lack of communication, everyone wants to be understood and tolerated, but in marriage, the art of communication is often ignored, relying on the silent payment of one party, absolutely unable to solve the problem, He Yuxin found after marriage that he seems to have few opportunities to have in-depth exchanges with "Brother Monkey", such a married life, over time, began to breed all kinds of contradictions, magnified small problems, and even the situation of the Cold War, in such a state, the sense of trust between each other, The sense of belonging is also slowly eroding
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If you want to save this marriage, you must first start with communication, He Yuxin decided not to endure it silently, she began to try to sit down with "Brother Monkey" face-to-face and have a good chat, instead of holding back the fire in her heart, communication is not blindly showing dissatisfaction, nor accusation, on the contrary, it should be rational and gentle to express your feelings and needs, with understanding and tolerance for each other, choose a relaxed dinner time, and gently tell each other: "I feel a little lonely at home alone at night, can I come back earlier?" Such a tone is easy for everyone to accept
Communication is a very important part of marriage, people often need a specific environment to open their hearts, share their inner thoughts and feelings, therefore, we can borrow some methods to deepen communication, such as regular dates, participate in some common activities, and even choose to watch some emotional films, and then discuss the plot inside, and jointly analyze the character's mentality, which can not only enhance intimacy, but also continue to strengthen the foundation of mutual trust between husband and wife
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Marriage is like a common practice, every day there are new challenges and obstacles in front of them, there are problems between husband and wife, the efforts of both parties are indispensable, sometimes, even a small change, can have a positive impact on the overall relationship, recalling every date before marriage, He Yuxin and "Brother Monkey" pay great attention to every detail, such as preparing each other's favorite food in advance, or creating surprises on special days, but after marriage, these details are slowly covered up by daily trivialities
In addition to effective communication and detailed management, mutual understanding and support are equally important, many times, our understanding of each other often stays on the surface, and deep emotions are often ignored, He Yuxin needs to understand that the reason why "Brother Monkey" does not go home is not that he does not love himself, to some extent, it may be because he is unwilling to face the responsibility and pressure brought by the family, the power of understanding lies in being able to accept each other's shortcomings, accompany and encourage each other in contradictions, rather than blindly blaming
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The expression of love can also be varied, everyone's understanding and expression of love is different, and the love between partners needs to be constantly adjusted and communicated, He Yuxin can use some small skills to enhance emotions, such as giving "Brother Monkey" a just right encouragement at the right time, sometimes, a simple sentence of "you are awesome" or "I believe in you" can make the other party feel warm and relieve life pressure and anxiety
Life always hopes to bring us joy, but often the cruel truth is that marriage is not only sweet, but also accompanied by responsibilities and challenges, in this case, the management of marriage has become a discipline that needs to be practiced for a lifetime, and the relationship between two people is destined to be not smooth sailing, we can see from He Yuxin's story, countless middle-aged couples in the face of life trivialities, family conflicts when confused and helpless
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But don't forget, life is actually full of possibilities, as long as you are willing to work hard to change, marriage can also be revitalized, on this road, you might as well take a heart of tolerance and understanding, let us find our happiness in the other half of life, love and marriage are not achieved overnight, but need to be cared for and managed with heart, in that trickle of persistence, maybe we can build a spiritual harbor together, so that love in the flow of years more and more mellow
Speaking of everyone, you may think, in fact, marriage is like a long journey, you and I need to work together, in this journey, we are inevitably young, immature, but as long as we are willing to walk hand in hand, through ups and downs, we can always harvest a piece of warm sun and beauty, I hope we can all grow together with our partners on this road, and find only our own happiness
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