Who would have thought that Lu Yu's reputation would also be reversed?
Talking about the host Lu Yu, many people have a very stereotypical impression of her.
For example, her trademark short haircut, and the words she always says in every interview: "Really? I don't believe it".
Some people like her, some hate her, and some question her hosting level.
But recently, Yang discovered that Lu Yu has been doing podcasts in the past two years, and his reputation is quite good.
In the podcast "Flowers in the Rocks", she interviewed outstanding female representatives from all walks of life, including business executives, best-selling authors, psychologists, architectural designers, talk show actors...
This show was originally a commercial project, but because the guests dared to speak out of the circle.
They talk about how to deal with anxiety as a woman, how to face the workplace, how to face life calmly...
If you have the same pain at this time, maybe you can find some reference answers here.
Guest Zhang Chun:
Live as if you were dead
Zhang Chun is one of the most discussed guests on the Luyu podcast.
In search engines, Zhang Chun is a famous writer who has published works such as "A Moment in My Life".
She is also a counselor and has her own podcast with many different identities.
As a superborn daughter in the family, the elders are either nurses or teachers for her future career plan, because she is close to home and convenient for taking care of her family.
It seems that the natural mission of girls is to teach their husbands and children, to be intimate little padded jackets for their parents, and to break into the world is what boys should do.
Fortunately, Zhang Chun did not grow according to the ideas of her elders, and she walked out of her own way.
The road is obviously not easy either.
Whether it's the biased perception of elders in childhood, or the sensitivity and cowardice of being treated differently in art school in adolescence, or the depression that grows up and works and is bedridden as a result...
These are the problems that many girls like her need to face.
During that low period, she often comforted herself: "If you don't have a goal, then live like death first and see what happens."
Her brother also encouraged her: "Save the dog's life and be fearless".
She shared her experience on the Luyu podcast, which also resonated with many netizens.
No matter how painful it is, death is no bigger, as long as it takes long enough to cross the abyss.
Zhang Chun admitted that she has always had the habit of smoking, and she kept this habit not because she likes to smoke, but because everyone around her told her that "good children should not smoke" since she was a child.
She didn't want to be swayed by others, so she chose to be a "maverick".
It wasn't until there was no such voice around her that she asked herself from the bottom of her heart if she really liked smoking, and the answer was no, so she quit completely.
"The so-called good choice has actually been polluted by the world for a long time, and there is always a person who directs your life and tells you what you have to choose. For the sake of self-selection, I can only exclude the good and choose the bad, so that I can prove that I have chosen."
When she was doing psychological counseling, she found that many people had such a misunderstanding and ignored their own individual feelings.
For example, some people think that their father does not like them, but they will make amends for the other party, and the father is also the one who is hurt.
But many people ignore that these are two separate facts, it is a fact that your father was injured, but it is also a fact that he caused you harm in getting along.
It is also important to look at things rationally and pay attention to your own individual feelings.
People are different, but they are all the same life, you can live diligently, you can live lying down, you can live by the rules, or you can live without the rules.
"Anyway, the ending of people is the same, so what's the hurry?"
Guest Pang Ying:
Stay at the table
Compared with Zhang Chun, guest Zhan Qingyun's life seems to be luckier.
But a Harvard Law graduate, she has her own predicament.
Zhan Qingyun's imagination of the law when he was a child came from Jennifer, the heroine of the work "Angry Angel", who single-handedly turned things around.
When she grew up, her professional idol became Justice Ginsburg.
A jurist and feminist in United States, she was the first woman to hold tenure in the history of Colombia University School of Law and the second female justice in the history of the United States Supreme Court.
During her 27 years in office, she worked to advance "the most divisive" issues such as abortion and was a pioneer in advocating for women's rights.
But after Zhan Qingyun was admitted to law school, the first problem she needed to face was the tuition fee of more than 1 million yuan.
She says it was Ginsburg's experience that inspired her.
"I was surprised that she revealed in her autobiography that she was raising a one-year-old child in her first year of law school."
Although the ages are different, the dilemma of all working women is similar:
"I'm under the waves, you can't see my feet kicking non-stop, all the effort is under the water, and on the calm water you only see a graceful swan."
To put it bluntly, the workplace is full of female ceilings.
Also featured on this podcast is Fan Beibei, a former managing director of HBO China and former managing director of Sotheby's China.
Back then, she was invited by Warner to be the president of Greater China, and her salary for the same position was much lower than that of her previous boss.
Although she withstood these workplace pressures, she tried her best to do her best in every job, so that those who examined herself were willing to bow to her.
But I still paid a great price and found out that I had neurospondylitis.
But the story doesn't end here, she, like Zhang Chun and Zhan Qingyun, chooses to continue to fight for her life.
She went to Antarctica to participate in marathons, boxing, etc., trying to try more possibilities in her limited life.
In this podcast, the women discuss the dilemmas that working women still face.
Although this workplace ceiling has been broken by excellent women for decades, it has always existed here in various forms.
For example, unequal pay for equal work, as well as the relationship between the workplace and family.
Guest Pang Ying said that when she was overseas, she had asked many colleagues with children, and most of the man's parents would want the girl to give up her career to take care of the family, even if the husband and wife are financially and intellectually equal.
Lu Yu also shared that when he signed a work contract once, a male colleague around him joked, "What if you have a child in the future"?
This kind of unconscious discrimination takes a long time to change, but it is more important for women to know that they have more possibilities.
Guest Pang Ying said that many outstanding women and seniors have a very important point when sharing their experiences: stay at the table and don't leave the game.
"No matter what our power style is, no matter what our power style is, at least we stay at the table and show what women are capable of to make an impact."
Just like Yang Li's words when facing others' questions about "why female talk show actors always talk about women's topics", "urging marriage is too old-fashioned", "don't talk about sanitary napkins if you can't get on the stage":
"We'll talk about that later, and if you feel offended, go look at something else."
Guest Teng Congcong:
Refuse body shame
When we are teenagers, we will struggle with whether we are good-looking or not, and we will have menstrual embarrassment.
As adults, we are deeply affected by self-anxiety and even sexual shame at all ages and bodies.
Female director Teng Congcong said in a podcast that after the release of the movie "Send Me to Qingyun", one of the clips of women exploring their sexuality alone was highlighted.
"This is the first time that such footage has been seen on a Chinese film screen," the industry said.
This puzzled her, because she just wanted to show a complete woman.
"Man is a high-class animal, with all the lust and sexual desires of animals, to enjoy and love his body, it is not a shame to have an orgasm."
"Your body is aging, your breasts are not full, you have a bucket waist, you don't deserve to deny yourself, every part of your body should be proud to be able to get sexual pleasure and satisfaction, which is a very important point for women's liberation."
As a woman, you will face many puzzles and dilemmas.
When I was young, I was afraid that the excitement outside had nothing to do with me, and when I gradually matured, I realized that making myself comfortable was the greatest joy.
Just like Chen Ying, the translator of "My Genius Girlfriend", after various attempts, finally chose to deepen the Italy language, and constantly conveyed the power of women in language in one translation after another:
"We have to tell our own stories in our own language."
Also featured on this podcast is writer Qi Jinnian.
For a period of time, she stayed away from the city and went deep into the Hengduan Mountains for three years, enjoying her own insignificance and freedom in nature, looking for a great explosion of sensibility in nature, and concentrating them in "Hengduan Waves";
Among the guests was Shinobu Yoshii, a female writer who wrote "Tokyo Eight Square Meters".
She used this book to document her life in Tokyo living in an eight-square-meter room.
She described herself as enjoying the best life at the lowest cost, just to do what she wants.
In the end, Yang wants to say that the experience of these female guests is just as the name of this podcast "Flower in the Rock" says:
Sometimes things don't go your way, but you still have to survive, and you still have to have some kind of moment of struggle to survive and break through the rocks.
"Being able to break through the ground and have such ability and tenacious vitality may be a special ability to survive that every woman needs to have in any era and environment."
Life is a choice, disgust brings you the power to choose, one road does not work, you can go another, you don't have to worry about the front and back, you can go anywhere.
Face this bizarre world with your own style and achieve yourself wholeheartedly, even if it is worth the trip.