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Author: Jiang Wenting, Zheng Chen
Anchor: Luo Tianming
When did "anxiety" become a key word on our lips? Fear of negative eyes from others, fear that the performance of exams will be abnormal, and fall into internal friction with an uncertain future...... In the face of the turbulent future, I can't help but think crankily and sensitively, and a little monster named "pressure" arrogantly burrows into my head, there are too many ignored voices to confide in, and there are too many silent efforts to be affirmed.
I know that I am a difficult flower to raise, so I choose to raise myself well.
01
"There are many kinds of love, and loving yourself is the first one"
Roommate Xiaobai is a girl with a weak personality and a good talker.
Every time there is a decision to make in the dormitory, she always takes into account our needs first, even if she wrongs herself.
"Xiaobai, can you help me make a ppt? I'm going to use it tomorrow, thank you! Good work! Xiao Can, who was next door, knocked on the door and poked out half of his head and said. Xiaobai looked at his computer and hesitated, and finally compromised: "Hmm...... Okay, okay. “
After Xiaocan left, I couldn't help but ask Xiaobai: "Aren't you also making PPT for reporting in class tomorrow?" I did it for her, what should you do with yourself? "But she just worked hard and thanked her, so hard to refuse...... It's okay, I'll stay up tonight. ”
A bell rang, and after Xiaobai picked up the phone, he said hesitantly: "I'm a little busy now." After a few seconds, he sighed and said, "Okay...... I'll come now. “
"Is Xiaobai finally done? Where are you going? "No, a classmate wanted to rub my little electric donkey to get a courier, she was not very stable on a bicycle, and asked me if I could take her." I watched Xiaobai walk out of the dormitory silently with the corners of her mouth pursed, knowing that her own business was about to be postponed again.
Summer is coming, the noon sun is hot and scorching, Xiaobai is carrying a full packing box, sweat covering his forehead. I was stunned: "How many people are you bringing food to?!" Oh my God, so much sweat, come and breathe under the air conditioner. ”
"Alas, I will pass by the cafeteria at the end of my shift, and many classmates ask me to help bring food," Xiaobai seemed to find an outlet and continued, "Actually, I want to refuse, they came to me for help before, and I don't really want to agree, obviously I also have my own things to do, but every time I refuse, I don't dare to say it, for fear that they will be unhappy." Now more and more people come to me for help, I don't want to be wronged anymore, I'm so anxious and uncomfortable. ”
In daily life, there are many people like Xiaobai. They always feel guilty when they reject others, always prioritize the feelings of others, dare not express their emotions, and are afraid to cause trouble to others. They smile as if wearing a mask, walking on thin ice, and are afraid to say "no", thus falling into anxiety. Learning to love yourself is the key to getting out of trouble.
"Why don't you try to be your own gardener? From now on, say 'no' boldly, try to look at yourself more, and water yourself. "I said this to Xiaobai.
Yes, don't let the flattering blur itself shape, treat yourself as a bouquet of flowers, and water it well.
02
"When I started to really love myself"
They all say to love yourself, but what does it mean to love yourself?
Most of my friends think that buying a bouquet of flowers for myself to add a sense of ritual is loving myself, eating the small cakes I want to eat to enhance my sense of happiness is loving myself, and occasionally embracing loneliness and enjoying alone time is also loving myself. It turns out that I am convinced of this, and I think that this is nothing more than the meaning of loving yourself.
Until I came across a post that said, "Imagine that you start raising a puppy for the first time, and you can understand how to love yourself by changing your feelings for them to yourself." ”
When I saw this line of text, I was enlightened, raising a puppy, no matter how you look at it, I think it is so cute, and I will always care about whether it eats well and plays well, even if it makes a big mistake, I will not really be angry with it, and I will want to refute it quickly when I hear others say that it is not good......
Therefore, loving yourself is not only about pleasing yourself, but also about accepting yourself, tolerating yourself, allowing yourself to make mistakes, allowing yourself to be imperfect, and supporting yourself" Although I didn't do my best this time, I am still great! ”
Grow up with you ·
Learn to truly love yourself
Accept and tolerate yourself
Let yourself be this flower
Let's be more open
Source | Editor of the Central Committee of the Communist Youth League | Liu Bo review | Ge Shuang