Sanmao: What has happened to her stranded youth, from a scavenger teenager to a writer?

As we all know, Sanmao is a well-known writer in the writing circle, and many of her works are loved by many people, but Sanmao in her childhood was a well-known problem student in school, so how did she go from a problem student to a literary writer?

01 Filled a lonely childhood with books

Sanmao's parents are intellectuals, after she was born, her parents named her "Chen Maoping" according to the order of the family tree, but when she was young, Sanmao felt that the "Mao" in the middle was not easy to write, and she must remove the difficult word, and finally her parents could not help her, so they had to remove the word "Mao" in the middle.

Before the age of 4, Sanmao played with her brothers and sisters, so at that time she was still relatively happy, and then her brothers and sisters went to school one after another, and no one played with her anymore. However, she has always been keen to explore, and soon found new pleasures in the study on the second floor of her home, and in this environment, Sanmao liked to read, and books became her only companion.

She wrote in the book: "At that time, the newspaper was not enough to read, so I swallowed any book when I got it. "There were not enough books in the house to read, so she went to her mother to ask for money to rent books to read." At that time, she had already begun to read large books, such as "The Count of Monte Cristo", "Jane Eyre", "Wuthering Heights", etc., and from these books, Sanmao saw a broader life and scenery, and the wandering seed planted in her heart began to sprout gradually.

After entering elementary school, Sanmao began to contact Chinese stories, and then came across two books that had a profound impact on his literary works: "Dream of the Red Chamber" and "Water Margin". If "Dream of the Red Chamber" is the opening of Sanmao's literary spirituality, then "Water Margin" is a kind of refinement of her writing style. If we carefully read Sanmao's works, we will find that her words are very simple and simple, but they can hit the depths of your soul, which is exactly the nourishment she draws from these two books.

Although Sanmao loves to read, she does not like the dogma of the school, so she often skips school to read books, and she also goes to the cemetery that many people are afraid to avoid, but for Sanmao, only there is a real small world for herself. In fact, since that time, Sanmao has already had a wandering subconscious. She respects her inner world and aspires to live freely and unfettered.

02 Stranded youth, from scavenger teenagers to problem students

In addition to his love of reading, Sanmao also has a very special preference, that is, picking up garbage. If this matter is for most parents now, they will definitely scold their children, but Sanmao's parents are a very enlightened intellectual, they respect Sanmao's very special preferences, and told her that these things will not be lost even if they move.

Despite such enlightened parents, there are no enlightened teachers. Once in composition class, the teacher asked everyone to write "dreams", and Sanmao wrote very frankly, saying, "I grew up one day and hope to be a person who picks up the rags." When the teacher saw it, he was furious and angrily asked Sanmao to rewrite it. Sanmao finally casually invented a dream of becoming a doctor, and the teacher smiled happily, thinking that this was in line with the dream of a good student like Sanmao. As a result, Sanmao's dream of scavenging was so stranded.

This composition class made Sanmao realize for the first time that the world was not as beautiful as imagined. If the composition teacher's denial can also let Sanmao's heart close a window, then in the second year of junior high school, the humiliation of the math teacher made Sanmao completely close his heart door.

It was when she was 13 years old, and because Sanmao's math scores were very poor, she was often ridiculed by her math teacher. The competitive Sanmao worked the subject of mathematics, and finally achieved good results in the final exam. But the math teacher thought that she was opportunistic, and in order to punish her, in front of the whole class, he drew two black and large circles on Sanmao's face with a brush dipped in ink, and said while drawing: "You love to eat duck eggs, the teacher gives you two big duck eggs." The students in the class laughed together, which was not enough, and the teacher also let Sanmao walk around the playground to accept the onlookers and ridicule of the whole school.

This time the humiliation made Sanmao's spiritual world collapse, and she completely closed her heart. Since then, she has ostensibly gone to and from school normally every day, but in fact she has truantly wandered around the cemeteries, accompanied by books. It wasn't until the school's official letter was sent home that parents learned that Sanmao had become a "problem student" who had truant from school. Later, her parents took a break from school.

03 Painting benefactor, open her heart with literature

After taking a break from school, Sanmao not only closed the door, but also closed the door of his heart. She saw no one, became more and more autistic, and even had to be brought to her room by her mother to eat. During this time, a large number of literary works can be said to run through ancient and modern times, spanning China and foreign countries, which laid a solid foundation for her good literary literacy in the future.

At that time, Sanmao was reading a Novel "Kappa" by a Japanese writer, and she also particularly liked this book, because the despair of the real world made Sanmao yearn for the other side of the soul described in the novel, and she was deeply immersed in this spiritual resonance of "Kappa".

On a typhoon-ravaging night, she dialed Taiwan's well-known lifeline and repeatedly said: "I can't live anymore, save me and save me." Although the operator has been actively discouraged, he has never been able to comfort Sanmao's desperate soul. She put down the phone and chose to kill herself by cutting her wrists.

Fortunately, Sanmao was rescued, after this suicide, Sanmao's parents were very worried and afraid, and felt that it was necessary to let Sanmao do something to divert her attention, which was best to make her have some connection with the world, and then help her slowly integrate and accept the world.

After much deliberation, Sanmao's parents decided to let her learn to paint and invited a painting teacher to teach her. Although the teacher taught very seriously, Sanmao also learned very seriously, but Sanmao could not find the resonance of the soul, in a chance, she saw the painting of a friend of her sister, must be three times finally found out about the person, this person is also the representative of taiwan's new wave painting school, called Gu Fusheng.

It is also because of this Gu Fusheng that Sanmao really began his own path of literary creation. Although Gu Fusheng is a teacher who teaches painting, he found that although Sanmao is good at capturing beauty, he does not have the talent to paint, and he feels that Sanmao is more suitable for using words to convey the beauty in her eyes. Therefore, under his recommendation, Sanmao's first work, "Confusion", was published in the December 1962 issue of Modern Literature.

It is precisely because of the publication of this work that not only gives Sanmao a resounding echo, but also a beginning for Sanmao to re-enter this world, so Sanmao finally stepped out of her heart and began to communicate with the world with words, officially opening her literary creation road.

Gu Fusheng thus became Sanmao's first guide on the road of literary creation, and the most important noble person in her life, although he taught painting. When she was in school, Sanmao's humiliation of her by her teachers formed her autistic personality due to her maverick behavior, but because of Gu Fusheng, Sanmao opened her heart.

On the road of life, the people and things we meet invisibly affect and change the direction of our lives.