Parents seem to have somewhat at odds with whether to snack their children.
Some are "satisfactionists" who think it's the child's nature to eat snacks, which is just a small thing, and the child wants to meet his needs.
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Others are "control factions" who feel that snacks are not hygienic and that eating more is useless, so they will strictly control children's eating. And yet you know what? If parents are too tightly controlled in this matter, it is not a good thing for children. The following realistic counterexample may tell you the answer!
"I never let my kids eat snacks..."
YunYun is a fierce strong woman, who has her own set of standards, whether at work or in life, she is strict with herself and will also make a lot of rules for others.
Since he was a child, his son Xiao Xiao has received his mother's militarized management education, strictly followed the "daily plan" on the itinerary every day, reviewed it for his mother at night, and wrote a "summary report of the day".
In this matter, Xiao Xiao can actually endure, after all, he is also a planned person, so it is not difficult to complete. In the relationship with his mother, what makes Xiao Xiao feel most suffocated is that his mother is too strong in her "desire to control" her snacks.
Yun Yun feels that snacks are the "source of all evil", one will hurt people's bodies, all kinds of junk food, too many additives, eating more is harmful to the body; second, it will destroy its mind, in order to satisfy the appetite, get temporary happiness, at the expense of health, it is really not a cost-effective deal.
But she ignored that her son Xiao Xiao was also a hungry little boy, and every day when he watched his classmates enjoy snacks happily, he would not be able to control the temptation, and the more strictly his mother managed at home and did not let him eat, the more curious he was and more eager.
One day, he secretly accepted the "feeding" of the same table, ate a bag of small biscuits, and was found by his mother on the same day, scolding Xiao Xiao, and running to the school to "warn" Xiao Xiao's classmates not to give snacks casually.
This move of his mother made xiao Xiao difficult to accept, but he did not know how to change his mother's thoughts.
The idea that "I never let my kids snack" sounds like it's for kids, but do you really know what harm this kind of thinking can do to kids?
What happens to children who were forbidden to eat snacks since childhood?
After reading the following two hidden dangers, parents who forbid their children to eat snacks, maybe you should let go -
1, too much restriction, but it is easy to make the child rebel
Professor Yin Jianli once put forward a point of view: "Strangling a child's small desire will stimulate the child's jealous desire and make it produce a compensatory psychology." ”
Children's thinking patterns are actually simpler than we adults think, and their desire for snacks may not come from the appetite, but from your discipline.
The more disciplined you are, the easier it is for them to rebel and the more eager they are to become. To satisfy this curiosity, they may secretly buy it with pocket money to eat, or eat more to compensate themselves.
Even when they grow up as adults, they will remember the bound self, and when they encounter things that contradict your opinion, they will habitually rebel and fight against you.
2. The "sense of scarcity" of childhood follows the child throughout his life
Some parents may deliberately "cry poor" in order to make their children eat less snacks.
In this way, it is often easy to lead to a "sense of lack" in children, which can also be called "a sense of unworthiness", and the child's subconscious may feel that he is not worthy of good use and does not deserve to eat well.
In the future, when they grow up, they will be a little happier and want to buy some good things to treat themselves, and the "sense of lack" will come to their hearts again, and they will feel that they will be ashamed of their parents now, so they choose to give up.
When facing a good material life, trembling and not daring to accept it calmly, children's life experience will naturally decline a lot.
And this feeling tends to follow the children's life, and cannot be cured when they grow up. Presumably, this result is not something that parents want to see.
So you see, forbidding children to eat snacks, this seems to be a small thing, but it also contains a lot of life philosophy, when we educate children, is not it through the accumulation of small things, pass on the attitude of children about life.
What is the right thing for parents to do?
1. Correctly guide children to eat snacks
Even if we become adults, sometimes we can't help but eat a few bites of junk food to relieve our hunger, so for children, eating a few bites of snacks is normal.
If parents are concerned about their child's health, rather than forbid him to eat, it is better to participate, choose healthy and delicious snacks with him, choose some low-sugar, low-calorie snacks, such as yogurt, nuts, etc., and occasionally let them eat a little "junk food".
In addition, we should also pay attention to the time of "feeding", try to eat 1 to 1 and a half hours before the meal, so that he can grind his teeth and avoid affecting the appetite of the meal.
2. Learn to face up to your child's needs
"As a parent, try to give your children a childhood that is not lacking."
How to create?
The first thing is to learn to face up to your child's needs!
When he proposes to eat snacks, the parents' first reaction should not be negative or ignored, which is often easy to hurt his psychology and make him feel that his emotional needs are ignored.
Rather, understand why he has this need, and then learn to meet it properly under reasonable conditions. In this way, children can feel that their parents are responding to themselves and giving themselves love, and their hearts will be more full.