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Circle of friends is a place where people share joys and sorrows and daily life, because the way to send a circle of friends is very convenient, so everyone often expresses their recent situation through the circle of friends.
When friends see your photos or texts, they can have a general understanding of your current situation, which can be said to greatly facilitate people's lives.
But from another point of view, the birth of the circle of friends not only allows people to increase their desire to express, but also infinitely magnifies desire and human nature.
A simple comment or a simple like, for the person who posted the news, this represents a positive attitude, so how can we get more people's approval?
The first method is to create some topics that are more in line with the public's expectations and interesting, such topics are usually more exciting, but also easy to resonate with the public, the degree of discussion is up, the heat will naturally increase.
The second method is to sensationalize the public, deliberately doing some strange behaviors that attract people's attention, in order to get everyone's ridicule and insults, which is the so-called black and red.
There are also many similar actions in the circle of friends, especially when a loved one dies, and the psychology of the circle of friends is far more complicated than you think.
From the perspective of most people, the death of relatives is undoubtedly a huge blow, some people wash their faces with tears, some people cry and weep, but in addition to grief, there is another type of person who often uses the circle of friends to "send mourning".
Why do some people even send a circle of friends when their relatives die? Generally these two kinds of psychology.
It is believed that this kind of behavior is disrespectful to the deceased, and since he has already left, it should be allowed to go quietly, rather than attracting public attention again in this way.
Quiet and serious handling of the aftermath for the deceased is the respect of the living for the deceased, and if such a thing is used to create a gimmick, it will undoubtedly make people scorn.
In disguise, it attracts attention
No matter from which point of view, sharing your daily trivialities on the public platform is to win people's attention, whether you admit it or not, to win the respect and recognition of others is the inner desire of people who like to share their daily life.
Maslow's hierarchy of needs states that people expect respect and approval from others as an instinctive reaction. And people who post such things as the death of relatives in the circle of friends are even more concerned about the eyes of others.
Such people do not regard the death of relatives as a big event, in their view, the departure of relatives is like eating a meal and taking a few scenic photos, so they will not hesitate to post in the circle of friends.
If you look closely, you will find that most of the people who do this kind of thing are teenagers, their minds have not yet developed soundly, and their cognitive ability and thinking ability are still in a one-sided and limited stage, so when they make this thing, they may not be able to realize how big the negative impact behind it is, and they are not aware of what kind of ideas this will make people around them.
Send heavy things to the circle of friends, all he can get is the tolerance and understanding of the people around him, but most of the people who seek understanding in the circle of friends have not reached the mature stage, and the truly mature people are often silent, they will not vent their pain at will, and they will not use their pain to exchange for the respect of others.
To be sure, the vast majority of those who send the movement of the death of relatives in the circle of friends are to win the attention of others, in their view, attention is recognition, but also a great affirmation of them, as for what way to get what he wants, it is actually not important.
Pursuing the approval of the people around them is almost everyone's work, but most people use a more reasonable way, and the actions of such people are particularly extreme, and when a person's behavior becomes stupid, it is difficult for him to arouse people's sympathy.
Force yourself to accept reality
There is also a category of people who send the news of the death of their loved ones in the circle of friends and not for the sake of eyeballs, they just want to wake themselves up faster.
The moment a loved one dies, everyone may not be able to react until you return to the empty home and see the traces of his life.
It takes a certain amount of time to digest a thing, and those who did not shed tears when their loved ones died may not be indifferent, but they are not mentally prepared, and subconsciously have not admitted the departure of their loved ones.
It wasn't until after the real reaction that everyone found that their loved ones would never come back, and perhaps at that moment he would send a circle of friends to show his acceptance of the incident.
If that's the case, then the dynamic isn't just a simple one to share, it's more like a fresh start.
In either case, people who share the news of the death of a loved one in the circle of friends will express disrespect for the deceased to a certain extent, but people's personalities are different, if it is just for nostalgia, then do not be too harsh.
- The End -
Author | Tommy
Edit | Rain
The First Psychological Writing Group | A group of young people who like to look up at the stars
参考资料：Bruk, A., Scholl, S. G., & Bless, H. (2018). Beautiful mess effect: Self–other differences in evaluation of showing vulnerability. Journal of personality and social psychology, 115(2), 192-205