Dear parents and friends, hello everyone, today we read "Children's Personality Education" together - the impact of the new environment on children's personality.
The psychological life of an individual is a unified whole, and a person's personality performance develops continuously and uninterruptedly from both vertical and horizontal.
But this does not mean that children's development is completely determined by genes, we want to know more clearly about the child's development at a certain stage, by allowing them to enter an unfamiliar environment, according to the characteristics they show in the new environment to observe.
For children, we usually find characteristics in children during their transition period, such as when the child is enrolled in school or when there is a major change in the family.
For example, there was once an adopted child who was grumpy, did not listen to adult discipline, and even often talked to himself, and when others asked him, he always answered what he asked. His adoptive parents were kind to him, but the little boy was still unhappy.
After learning what the boy really thinks, we learn that the boy subconsciously believes that although he and the biological children of the adoptive parents are treated equally, the adoptive parents must be more concerned and caring for their own children. So he resisted by throwing a tantrum in order to achieve his desire to leave the house.
When we understood the boy's inner thoughts, we didn't find it strange that he had lost his temper. When children make mistakes, our blind adoption of punitive measures does not solve the problem, but makes the child feel justified in resisting.
Many children have the same psychological problems, but the behaviors they exhibit are diverse, which can be summed up as the same destination. Although the possibility of human error is innumerable, there is only one truth, which is also the peculiarity of human nature.
For some children's behavior, we cannot judge whether it is correct or not from our common sense. Because some mistakes are due to mistakes in the goals they have set in their consciousness, which leads to wrong behavior.
When we use the new environment to test the child's personality, once the child is not ready to meet the new environment, the child's judgment of the new environment will be distorted, and then make an unreal response, unable to integrate well into the new environment.
In short, children's mistakes or rebellious behaviors in school are not the result of problems with the school's education system, but rather the child's lack of preparation for this new environment.
In fact, our research on the new environment is not because the new environment will cause children to become bad, but through research, we can more clearly find the quality of children's readiness, or the lack and inadequacy of coping with the new environment.
If a child has been performing well before going to school, then we can judge that the child cannot adapt to the new environment for the time being; if a child has not performed very well in the past three years, then we need to understand the child's experience in the past three years and then make a judgment.
In general, the lack of self-confidence when the child is unable to use the school life, but usually when the child encounters the first failure at school, it does not attract enough attention from the adult, which has a profound impact on the child.
For failure, some children can be encouraged, and some children will be devastated.
No child suddenly becomes bad, before this there are many objective conditions, such as a weak child, there must be a mother who loves him incomparably;
A timid child must have a parent who can be relied on, which helps them to feel pampered and restricted, but these feelings can also become obstacles when they integrate into a new environment, such as a timid child who needs to be affirmed and paid attention to when he enters a new class.
Temperament, temper and emotion are regarded as the third sexual characteristics of man, but the third sex of man is not born this way, but is acquired.
In recent years, the more concerned issues of sex education have often been troublesome, for which we have done a series of questionnaires, such as "To what extent does children's sexual development and sexual experience develop to make them understand sex?" ”
Ninety percent of parents or educators on this issue believe that there is no fixed standard, and it is best to carefully analyze the child's actual situation or psychology before explaining whether to tell them about sexual problems.
We do not advocate premature explanations of this for children here, even if it does not necessarily have a harmful effect on children.
From the first day a child enters school, the child enters a completely unfamiliar environment, and the new environment of the school is a test of the child's readiness, if not fully prepared, it is a complete exposure of all deficiencies and deficiencies.
In general, children need to learn to cooperate with teachers, cooperate with classmates, and become interested in various subjects.
The student's interest in the classroom largely determines whether he focuses on his studies, many students are completely spoiled by their families at home, and the child's attention is focused on demanding pampering, not on the school's academics, but if the child is favored by the teacher, the grades will improve by leaps and bounds.
But not every child can be pampered by a teacher, so it's important to be ready for school early.
After the child enters school for a period of time, the school will give the report card, and in recent years, the intelligence test has become popular, and many parents who have obtained the test results regret using this test result as a final and complete judgment on their children.
But people who tend to score higher on the test results live an ordinary life when they grow up, while children with lower test scores in childhood grow up to be successful.
On the one hand, this shows that a simple test result does not explain anything, on the other hand, it shows that after the efforts of the day after tomorrow, children can become more excellent.
We have observed the situation of students between fast classes and slow classes, but in fact, children in slow classes are not mentally inferior, but because they are born poor and are not prepared for school, they are full of vigilance against the school environment.
To this end, the tutor should give more help to such children, through playing games, reading, etc., so that they can get more self-confidence, rather than just in the slow class to experience discouragement and discouragement.
In short, the ideal educator should have a sacred sense of mission: they can forge the hearts of students, and even control the future of children.