Everyone will think about a question, people are in the rivers and lakes, so should I be gregarious?
The question of "whether to be gregarious" has troubled countless people. However, after some struggle, countless people will choose to fit in. Because they are afraid that they will become different.
In their opinion, if they don't have friends around them, they will be looked down upon; If one person does things, he will be weak; If you live alone, you will lose face.
This kind of concept, after all, is temporary. As people experience and receive the beatings of life, then they will change 180 degrees.
No matter how much people like to socialize, they will stay away from socializing; No matter how gregarious people are, they will stay away from the group; No matter how much you are afraid of becoming an alien, you will willingly live as an alien.
When a person is no longer gregarious and socially distancing, it means that he has these thoughts.
1. I hate the sophistication of human feelings and advocate simplicity and simplicity.
We might as well think about a question: Is it meaningful for ordinary people to pay attention to human feelings, or to delve into human feelings? It makes a little sense, but it doesn't mean much.
In the official family, or in the wealthy class, it is necessary to talk about the sophistication of people. Everyone behaves according to this set of rules, and if you don't talk about it, then you won't be able to get along.
The problem is that ordinary people are not in the official family, nor are they in the rich class, the vast majority of them are the working class, and the significance of the sophistication of the world to them is relatively small.
The complex human relationship is sophisticated, and it is impossible for ordinary people to climb to a high position; Cumbersome human feelings are sophisticated, and it is impossible for ordinary people to make money. For ordinary people, human feelings are sophisticated and harmless but not beneficial.
When we see through this, we will hate the world, and we will stay away from the world. Complicated days are not easy after all, and it is not as good as a simple life.
Even the strong people of the elite class want to live a simple life, but when they are in Vanity Fair, they are just "people in the rivers and lakes, and they can't help themselves".
2. I don't want to be bound by others, I just want to live freely.
Fit in and enter the circle, you are destined to be bound by people and live uncomfortably. What others do, you need to do, there is no such thing as your own opinions and choices.
This kind of "being bound" days, as long as there are too many of them, you will feel bored, and you will even have the numbness of "walking dead".
Think about it, how can a normal person accept the reality of numbing life? Since it is unacceptable, then you can only change your way of life, from being gregarious, to becoming no longer gregarious.
We don't care what others think of us. Even if others say that we are different, we don't care at all. Because we know that life is our own, not someone else's.
If a person lives for a lifetime, it is just a lifetime, if he lives a life of grievance and no chic, then what is the meaning of life? Whether you fit in or not is just a matter of choice. Quality of life is the key.
If you think that gregariousness lowers the quality of life, then I advise you not to be gregarious. A low-quality gregarious is not as good as a high-quality solitude.
3. See the sinister nature of human nature and return to the peaceful world.
Only when people have seen the ultimate darkness and fear can they understand and figure out certain problems. Take the "hearts of the people of the world" as an example, if you have not suffered the hardships of the hearts of the world, you will not be able to see through the truth of the hearts of the people of the world.
In the beginning, we all thought that human nature is inherently good, and as long as we treat others kindly, others will treat us kindly.
It turned out later that this was nothing more than wishful thinking. Even if we remain kind, we do not necessarily mean that others will remain kind. Possibly, others will be even more vicious.
You can't embrace the light without being in contact with the darkness; If you have not seen the sinister nature of human nature, you cannot live soberly; If you haven't been bullied, you can't mature.
If you want to live a mature life, there is a price after all. The price of a lighter one is to be covered in bruises. And the heavier price is that both people and money are empty.
For the hearts of the world, there is no need to have too many expectations. Instead of pinning your hopes on others, you should put your hopes on yourself. Returning to a peaceful world and living freely and well is worth the world.
Fourth, the focus is gradually shifting, and the family is the most important.
When you are young, people tend to focus on outsiders. At a certain age, people's attitudes change, and they will focus on their family members.
Family members are more important than outsiders. No matter how good you are to outsiders, outsiders will not be grateful to you. And if you are kind to your family, your family will be particularly touched.
I believe many people understand this truth, but why can't young people do it? Because they have too little experience and have not done enough addition to life, it is naturally impossible to abandon wrong expectations and delusions.
Before the age of 40, we have to do the addition of life, the purpose is to touch everything as much as possible, to see what we are suitable for and what we are not suitable for.
After the age of 40, we have to do the subtraction of life, the purpose is to remove meaningless people and things from our lives. "Break away" to a certain extent, and gradually drift away from outsiders who have nothing to do with it.
Pay attention to relatives, ignore outsiders, value family, ignore the external environment, value yourself, and no longer fit in. Living in this way, life will not be painful, and the soul can be more chic and free.
Text/Shushan has deer