Author: Wen Qiusheng
Original article, plagiarism must be investigated
01. Introduction
Marriage is like a castle.
It needs to be cleaned and repaired by men and women for a long time, otherwise it may be in tatters.
If two people live together, and the man is too lazy to participate in the construction of the family and do not take on the housework, the woman will carry the burden forward in the marriage.
Women, who want men to not "shake their hands in charge", take the initiative to pay for you as a means, a behavior: change.
02. Change the way you speak: learn to show weakness and guide you to pay
I have a cousin who, after she got married, felt very sorry for her husband, so she took care of everything herself.
When the water pipes at home were broken, she was reckless and repaired them herself; Sometimes she doesn't squeak when she has low back pain, and she endures the pain and mops the floor clean.
She is always very strong, and she also tries to do things at home as much as possible.
It wasn't until later, after she had a child, that she couldn't take care of the housework. And her husband seems to be accustomed to acting as a "hands-off shopkeeper", and still feels that she should be responsible for the affairs of the family.
My cousin suddenly woke up to the fact that women are too reckless and pay too much, which will only make men lazier and lazier.
Since then, my cousin has been showing weakness, and in the presence of her husband, she will become "weak".
I can't lift the oil at home, I can't hold my children, and I can't drag ...... As she showed weakness again and again, her husband became more and more diligent.
Zhang Xiaoxian once said: "I thought that love could overcome everything, but who knew that she was sometimes powerless." I thought that love could fill the regrets of life, but it was love that created more regrets. ”
In fact, it is often not others who create regrets for love, but yourself.
When a man becomes a "hands-off shopkeeper", the woman must learn to show weakness, guide the man to take on the housework, and let him pay.
For example, if the light bulb at home is broken, show weakness and let him fix it; The sofa at home needs to be moved, don't be stubborn, ask him to help move it......
Guide a man to pay, and he will get used to taking on housework and paying for you.
03. Change the blame mode: learn to be coquettish and let him bear it
I've seen a video that says:
Before getting married, men are not good at housework, and after marriage, because they feel sorry for their wives, they do housework as much as possible.
However, the first time he cooked, he burned the vegetables; The first time I washed dishes, I broke a bowl; The first time I went to throw out the garbage, the garbage bag broke, and the garbage fell to the ground.
The woman couldn't help but complain to him, how could he not do a little thing well?
In the midst of women's accusations again and again, men are less and less inclined to take on housework.
After that, she could only take on the burden of cooking and no longer let him cook; Because she was afraid that he would break the dishes, she went to wash the dishes herself. More and more housework fell on her, making her miserable.
In this world, there is no perfect person, everyone needs to grow and learn.
The same goes for learning to do housework.
In "Howl's Moving Castle", it is said: "Love is not to look for a perfect person, but to learn to appreciate the imperfect person with perfect eyes." ”
Women, if you want men not to be "hands-off shopkeepers", women must learn to change the mode of accusation, but learn to be coquettish.
For example, when you want him to wash the dishes, you coquettishly say: Husband, I know you love me the most, can you put the dishes away today?
If a woman wants to be happier, she must learn to guide a man to give.
When a man has done housework, the woman should also praise him in time to strengthen his value and make him more willing to take on housework next time.
Whether he does well or not, don't blame, but praise him for his efforts.
04, Wen Qiusheng's message
Men, there are endless housework and trivialities in marriage, and they must learn to take their part of the responsibility and manage each other's feelings.
There is a sentence in "It's Okay, It's Love" that says it well: "Love is not about giving up something for the other party, but about doing something for the other party." ”
Learn to give, not be lazy, and fill a care and love in all aspects of life, and women will perceive it.
Two people give to each other, run together, love each other, and love each other, and love will become flourishing.
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About the author: Wen Qiusheng, make a living from words. Autumn wind and rain, a glass of sake, three or two stories, on the lonely road with you as a companion.