Today, let's briefly talk about the four mistakes when chatting with your ex, which we often make, and I hope you will avoid them in the process of recovery.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
First, don't talk about it at a high frequency;
For example, the most common thing for everyone is: good morning and good night, what are you doing, have you eaten? This is a typical lack of words to talk about, and your ex can see your intentions at a glance.
I also know that the reason why you do this is because your heart is worried, you are worried that if you don't contact your ex, the emotional bond between you will break, and your relationship will just disappear.
Here, like other mentors, I can tell you not to worry, your ex will not forget you. But such persuasion often treats the symptoms but not the root cause, and your inner worries never linger.
So I'm going to tell you about it from a different angle.
From the bottom of your heart, what is an emotional relationship?
If you feel that the relationship needs to be constantly in contact with the other person, and you need to maintain it every day, do you feel tired to maintain the relationship?
Suppose that you have maintained relationships from childhood to adulthood by constantly contacting, doesn't that mean that you spend your daily time maintaining relationships, and this is all you have in your life, and you have no time for other things. Isn't this state very similar to what your mind is full of your ex at this time?
At this time, you will calm down and understand that your relationship has never been managed by you deliberately, but that you have met such a like-minded person, and you have become friends and classmates and colleagues, and the two people will naturally get along, and the relationship will gradually heat up. If you deliberately pursue this kind of relationship, it will seem strange.
Based on your in-depth thinking about the origin of your relationship, you know that relationships are not maintained by you deliberately, and that deliberately maintaining relationships will only make each other tired.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
Now that you have broken up, the other party already has an embarrassing feeling for you, and you still ignore this feeling and forcibly let your relationship come together, and keep having nothing to say, then the other party will only feel that your relationship is getting more and more awkward, and feel more and more bad, and will only want to escape from contact with you more, and may occasionally respond to you at the beginning, and may not reply directly in the future.
So the more you forcibly hold on to the relationship, the faster you lose.
second, I don't know my identity;
I've said this many times, and many times you make mistakes in the process of recovery, because you don't recognize who you are at the moment.
For example, if someone chats with an ex, they will question their ex, even if they want to redeem it, they will be justified and scold their ex; Or follow your ex, and when you see your ex having the opposite sex around you, you have to get to the bottom of it, etc.
To solve this problem, you have to calm yourself down and let go of your childish ideas. If you ask me if there's a better way, I'll tell you: no, the only way is to wake yourself up.
Holding on to the identity of a couple, it's actually a bit of a taste of covering your ears and stealing the bell, obviously a broken relationship, you pretend not to see it, and continue to go your own way, leaving you with only a disgusted expression from your ex.
I have always told you before that falling in love is two originally independent people walking the road of life together, and it is very important to become an independent person first, and it is very important to have your own life.
Xiaoyu said to redeem
Those who hold on to the identity of the couple are essentially treating each other as their own belongings, even if the other party is not happy, they also forcibly interfere with each other's lives, which is a very wrong concept of love, I hope everyone can recognize the harm and recognize the fact of breaking up as soon as possible.
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