1.
Growing up, I have always been envious of other people's children.
Because, other people's parents can make a bowl of water even, but my parents have been partial to my brother since he was a child.
My brother is 6 years younger than me, and he is the child my parents have been looking forward to.
Therefore, after his younger brother was born, his parents gave him the best in everything. They also kept telling me: I am an older sister, and I need to take good care of my younger brother.
During the holidays, my brother has new clothes, and I probably don't.
My grandmother loved me the most in the family, because she basically brought me up when I was a child.
Sometimes, my grandmother would use her private money to buy me new clothes and flowers that little girls liked.
It's just that when we go back, if our grandfather sees us, they will scold us.
Grandpa said, I'm a girl, I'm going to get married sooner or later, why spend money on me.
Grandma naturally disagreed, but she didn't want to quarrel with her grandfather.
Grandpa has a short temper, and grandma can't compete with his fists.
As for my parents, their minds are on my brother.
Spend money for my brother, as much as they want. I asked for two yuan to buy a pen and a notebook, but my mother still nagged for a long time and was reluctant to give it to me.
Actually, my family's conditions are not bad, and my mother just doesn't want to spend money for me.
So, since I was a child, I have been very aggrieved.
2.
In order to be able to escape from my parents, I had to study hard.
I did well in my studies, and every time I took an exam, I was able to get in the top few.
After my younger brother went to school, his grades were not good. He didn't do well in the exam, but my mother caught me and scolded me, saying that it was all my fault as an older sister, that I had good grades, and that I only cared about myself and didn't teach my younger brother.
However, I am not my brother's teacher or parents, how can I teach him?
Some neighbors envy me for my good grades and tell my mother that I am very good. As a result, my mother waved her hand and said to people: What's amazing, it's not a girl yet, how good can it be?
Listening, my heart is cold.
When I was a child, I didn't understand, and I once felt that I was not good enough, so my parents didn't like me.
Later, as I grew older, I began to understand that even if I did too much, they didn't see me as good. And I have long been accustomed to disappointment, loss, and sadness.
With the connivance of my parents, my younger brother couldn't study, and he was the first to get into trouble in fights.
However, every time he got into trouble, my dad would praise him and say that he was worthy of his son.
I can't even listen to these words.
My brother bullied his classmates, and his parents came to him, but my mother insisted that my brother was very well-behaved and would definitely not do such a thing.
I was embarrassed to hear it.
At the same time, I was thinking that if I got into trouble, my parents would definitely throw me out.
That's the difference between loving and not loving.
I got good grades and was admitted to a local key high school, and my mom almost stopped me from going to school.
Later, I quietly went to the principal of the high school, and they agreed to give me free tuition.
In addition, the junior high school homeroom teacher also came to the house and persuaded my mother, so she let me continue to go to school.
3.
When I was in high school, my living expenses were the least. Because all my family's money is spent on my brother. He wears designer clothes and shoes.
Walking out with my brother, he is like a young master from a rich family, and I am like that little nanny.
Fortunately, when I have books to read, I am very content.
My college entrance examination results are not bad, and I am very book-heavy. After graduating, I didn't go to graduate school and went to work in Shanghai.
At first, my salary was not high, but my mother asked me to give her 2,000 yuan a month. I gritted my teeth and gried.
Later, when my younger brother went to vocational high school, my mother asked me to give him another 2,000 living expenses a month.
At that time, I only had eight or nine thousand yuan a month, and I had to give half of it.
However, I learned to complain that I only had a salary of 6,000 and could only give my brother 1,000 for living expenses. Otherwise, I won't have money to eat.
My mother scolded me, saying that I studied well, what was the use, and I didn't work for others to earn so much money.
I didn't bother to pay attention to her.
It's just that I understand more and more that I don't have to rely on myself. So, I took the initiative to apply to do sales.
I'm like a man, I'm working hard, my performance is good, and my commission is increasing little by little.
Slowly, I saved some money in my hands, but I couldn't let my mom know.
During the holidays, other children go home happy, but I don't want to go back. Because as soon as I went back, my mother asked me to buy this and that, to buy it for them, and to buy it for my brother.
If, if I hesitate, she will say those ugly things.
The person I really want to honor is my grandmother, but unfortunately at this time, she has passed away.
4.
Later, at work, I met my husband, who had better conditions than me.
When we were about to get married, my mother insisted that the lion open his mouth and ask for a bride price of 200,000 yuan.
My husband wanted to give so much, and I said, don't. At most, give 100,000.
I told my mother that my husband's family conditions are not good, only 100,000 at most. My mother naturally scolded again, saying that I was looking for someone who was so poor.
I said, just 100,000, do you want to love it? Otherwise, I'll take the money myself.
My mom quickly took the money. Naturally, there is no dowry.
Fortunately, in those years, the commission was very generous, and I had quietly saved more than 1 million in my hands.
However, this money was used to buy a house with my husband. The in-laws and the money saved by the husband, they gave a total of more than 2 million.
With the money I had, we bought a small house in Shanghai.
It's just that I can't tell my parents about this.
My husband asked me why, didn't my parents want to see me doing well?
I said, they don't care if I'm doing well or not. All they care about is how much money I can give my brother.
Sure enough, my brother wanted to buy a wedding house, and my mother opened her mouth to ask me to pay 300,000.
I said, I don't have a good job, I have to rent a house, and I don't have so much money in my hand, at most 50,000 yuan.
My mother scolded me on the other end of the phone again, and I said, if you scold me again, you will only give 20,000 yuan. My mom was immediately silenced.
I knew she must have scolded me to death.
But I really don't want to hear anything bad about her.
On the 18th day of the eighth month of the lunar calendar, my brother had a wedding.
My mother told me very early on that I should be as casual as I go, no less than 20,000 yuan. She said, too little, not good-looking. He also said that whoever is in the neighbor and whose sister is given 30,000 or 50,000.
I only smiled bitterly.
5.
My mom never asked, how I was doing, and never cared about my life.
My daughter, who is just one year old, is helped by her in-laws.
When I gave birth to a child, my parents didn't say anything about going over to see me, let alone giving me a red envelope or anything.
Fortunately, I also know them and don't count on them.
To my mother-in-law, I also confessed the situation of my family, but she hugged me and said that she would hurt me in the future.
Therefore, our mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have always had a good relationship.
This year, it's not been easy for us.
First of all, her husband was laid off, and he looked for a new job, and the treatment was far worse than before. On my side, there are a lot of salary cuts, and the business is not easy to do.
Every month, we have to raise children and take out a mortgage of more than 10,000 yuan. We are struggling as a young couple, and my in-laws are already trying their best to supplement us with their pensions.
And my mother opened her mouth tens of thousands, where did I get the money?
In the end, I discussed with my husband that the gift of 8,000 was also my intention to be a sister.
In order to show that we attach importance to my brother's wedding, my husband and I both took a leave of absence and went back a day early.
That night, after dinner, I gave the red envelope to my brother.
As a result, my mother snatched the red envelope and took out the money to count it, her face changed, and she said: Why is there only such a little.
When she did that, I was already angry and felt that she didn't respect me at all.
Of course, it's my wishful thinking, if I know how to respect, is it still my mother?
I held back my anger and said: Mom, our life is not easy either, we can only take so much.
My mom started scolding me again, and I was so uncomfortable that I immediately packed up and prepared to go back.
In the end, my brother asked my mother to say less, and he also said that I promised to accompany him to pick up his relatives the next day.
6
In the end, I stayed.
It's just that this night, I felt very uncomfortable.
My husband saw that I was uncomfortable and kept comforting me.
The next day, the group was ready to go to the hotel.
Unexpectedly, before leaving, my mother was angry with me again: You, who are my sister, and my younger brother is married, so you are embarrassed to go to dinner?
My dad didn't speak.
The younger brother they walked ahead and did not hear.
At this moment, I don't think I need to endure it, I said: That's good! From now on, you will not have my daughter, let's cut it off! In the future, you don't call me again to ask for money. Your pension, you have a son, you remember not to look for me!
After speaking, I pulled my husband: Let's go back.
My husband helped me wipe away my tears and said, "Okay."
My mother wanted to scold again, but then my aunt grabbed her and said that she would save some face for the child and be a happy day.
My aunt and uncle wouldn't let me, but I cried and left.
On the way back, I cried all the way, and I said: Husband, from now on, I will not have a mother's home.
My husband said: Don't worry, I will love you well.
When my mother-in-law learned about what my mother-in-law had done, she said, "Don't worry, from now on, I will be your mother."
I hugged her and cried.
I've blocked my parents' phone numbers, and I feel so tired of being their daughter.
Why bother?
Since they don't love me, from now on, I love myself well.
Now, I understand more and more that some parents really don't love their children.
So, if you are the child who is not loved, remember to love yourself well and don't try to please them, it's useless.
No matter how good we do, we can't warm their hearts, so it's better to save energy! Keep your money and love to yourself!