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Nowadays, it has become a common phenomenon for the elderly to help take care of their grandchildren. However, how to effectively raise children, many elderly people may not have thought it through, and sometimes even complain that their children have put too much pressure on them, or feel that their children are not filial enough.
As children, their main task is naturally to work hard and provide financial support to the family. However, if the elderly in the family cannot provide enough help, even if the income is high, they may feel powerless.
It takes several generations for a family to thrive. It is not enough to rely on middle-aged people to make money, the elderly also play an important role in the family, they not only have to pass on the good family style, but also to give assistance and support in childcare and household management.
If you are also raising a baby for your children, remember that you can't do any of the following 5 things, otherwise it will become the fuse for the breakdown of family relationships.
1. Always go to mahjong, square dance, and leave the children aside.
Helping to take care of the baby means shouldering the responsibility of taking care of the child, ensuring the safety and healthy growth of the child is the top priority, if the elderly are too addicted to their own entertainment activities, such as frequent mahjong or square dancing for a long time, and put the child in a state of unattended, this is extremely irresponsible. Children may have accidents due to lack of supervision or have feelings of neglect, affecting their mental health. In the long run, the children will inevitably feel dissatisfied and angry with the behavior of the elderly, which will lead to family conflicts. After all, the children ask the elderly to help take care of the baby in the hope that the child can be properly cared for and loved, rather than being left aside and left unattended.
2. Very superstitious, and when you encounter something, you ask for great immortals everywhere.
Scientific education and nurturing are essential for a child's growth. If the elderly show excessive superstition in the process of raising a baby, and do not rely on rational thinking and scientific methods to solve any problems, but go around asking God to worship Buddha and seek the help of great immortals, this will pass on wrong values and cognitive ways to children. As a result, children may have doubts about scientific knowledge and lack rational thinking and problem-solving skills. In modern society, this kind of superstitious behavior not only fails to solve practical problems, but can also cause children to grow up lost and confused. Children usually hope that their children can receive modern education and cultivate a correct world view and methodology, and the excessive superstition of the elderly will undoubtedly conflict with the educational philosophy of their children, and then affect the harmony of family relations.
3. Instigating children to do things that lack morality.
Children are like a blank slate, and their character and behavior habits are greatly influenced by the people around them. If the elderly instigate their children to do some immoral, uncivilized or even illegal things, such as spitting, cutting in line, bullying the weak, etc., this will seriously distort the child's values and morals. Good moral character is the cornerstone of a child's future foothold in society, and this negative teaching of the elderly will make the child deviate from the right track on the road of growth. When children find out about this improper instigation of the elderly, they will inevitably feel sad and angry, which will undoubtedly have a huge impact on family affection, and may even lead to the breakdown of family relationships.
4. He likes to find fault with his daughter-in-law and son-in-law, which leads to the disharmony of his children's marriage.
In a family, a harmonious relationship between husband and wife is the foundation of family stability. When the elderly help with the baby, they should respect the lifestyle and choices of the children and their spouses, rather than being critical of their daughters-in-law or sons-in-law. Excessive pickiness can lead to conflicts and conflicts within the family, leaving children in a dilemma. The daughter-in-law or son-in-law may feel aggrieved and dissatisfied because of the pickiness of the elderly, which will affect the relationship between the husband and wife. Tension in family relationships can have a negative impact on children's growth, and at the same time, they will also have resentment and dissatisfaction with the elderly, causing a rift in family relationships.
5. Spend money very generously and cultivate children's luxury habits.
Children's consumption concepts need to be correctly guided and cultivated from an early age. If the elderly spend money without restraint when taking care of the baby, and meet the various material needs of the child too generously, it is easy for the child to develop the habit of extravagance and waste. Children may become unaware of the fruits of their labor, lack the spirit of hard work, and only pursue material comforts. When children find that their children have developed such bad consumption habits, they will inevitably question and be dissatisfied with the education methods of the elderly. In the long run, this will not only affect the future development of children, but also put pressure on the family economy, which will lead to disputes and conflicts within the family.
Raising a baby for children is a job full of love and responsibility, and we need to always pay attention to our words and deeds to avoid the above behaviors that may destroy family relationships. It is necessary to take care of children in a scientific, rational and caring way, and create a healthy and harmonious environment for children's growth. At the same time, children should also be grateful for the efforts of the elderly, communicate with the elderly, and work together for the future of the children and the happiness of the family. Only in this way can we enhance family affection in the process of bringing a baby and make the family more harmonious and happy.
Author: Lao Pang
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