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In 2018, the Chinese music scene was shocked by an embarrassing news: the once popular rock singer Siqingerile has now been reduced to a fringe figure with a worrying mental state and almost forgotten.
The prairie eagle, who has appeared on the stage of CCTV Spring Festival Gala four times and is known as "China's first female rock singer", is now bursting into tears when he heard a belated apology from his former mentor Zang Tianshuo.
"I apologize for the initial fault." This sentence seems to uncover a long-sealed past. What kind of experience made this once radiant queen of rock fall from the altar? Let's uncover this twisty and bizarre life story together.
The story of Siqingerile begins in the vast steppes of Inner Mongolia. This land has nurtured countless lofty aspirations, and it has also nourished her love for rock and roll. The young Siqingerile had a thirst for music in his eyes and a vision for the future burning in his heart.
With a passion for rock and roll, Siqingerile resolutely left his familiar hometown and came to the strange metropolis of Beijing alone. When she first arrived in Beijing, her face still had the characteristic greenness of a grassland girl, but her eyes revealed firmness and perseverance.
In order to chase his musical dreams, Siqingerile did not hesitate to sing in bars and perform on the streets. She puts her heart and soul into every performance, as if she wants to pour all the passion in her heart into it.
Gradually, she formed her own band, the Goshawk Band. Although the team members have left one after another due to livelihood problems, she still insists on her musical ideals and supports this hopeful music dream alone.
Just when Siqingerile felt lonely and helpless, fate arranged a seemingly beautiful encounter for her. In 1999, in a bustling bar in Beijing, she met Zang Tianshuo, the man who was about to change her life.
At that time, Siqingerile had just completed a wonderful performance, and Zang Tianshuo was deeply attracted by her unique charm.
Zang Tianshuo took the initiative to step forward and sent a warm invitation to this rookie in the music industry: "Hello, my name is Zang Tianshuo, is it possible for us to perform a work together one day in the future?" This invitation flattered the newcomer to the music scene, and she accepted it without hesitation.
In this way, Siqingerile joined Zang Tianshuo's band and began her new journey in the world of rock music. The entire band worked together to create some of the most impressive pieces.
Siqingerile was full of expectations, thinking that his music career was about to usher in new glory.
Little did she know, however, that this seemingly beautiful encounter would be a turning point in her life, bringing her not only a brief moment of joy, but also the seeds of endless pain.
The gears of fate begin to turn, and a storm that can change her life is quietly brewing.
The appearance of Zang Tianshuo is like a dazzling light shining into Siqingerile's life. The singer, who was already well-known in the music scene, became interested in the young Siqingeriga.
In the process of long-term cooperation, Siqingerile was gradually impressed by Zang Tianshuo's talent, and his admiration for him spontaneously emerged.
The collision of hearts and the time spent together day and night make the relationship between them deepen day and night. Siqingerile's eyes began to reveal adoration and admiration, and his heartbeat accelerated because of Zang Tianshuo's glance or words.
Little did she know, however, that she was stepping into an elaborate love trap.
Zang Tianshuo deliberately concealed the fact that he was married, and even asked the other members of the band to keep it a secret. He weaved a beautiful future with sweet words, which immersed Siqingerile and couldn't extricate himself.
When Zang Tianshuo asked for cohabitation, Siqingerile agreed without hesitation. She naively believes that this is a testimony of love and the only way for the relationship between the two to sublimate.
On a passionate night, Siqingerile dedicated his first time to Zang Tianshuo. At that time, her face was filled with happiness, thinking that she had finally found the true love of her life.
Zang Tianshuo used all kinds of sweet words and vows to promise to be responsible for her for the rest of his life. Siqingerile was moved to tears, mistakenly believing that he had met the only one in his life.
However, the illusion of happiness was soon shattered. One day, Zang Tianshuo suddenly said something that puzzled Siqingerile: "Li Mei is pregnant." After questioning, Siqingerile learned that Li Mei was actually Zang Tianshuo's legal wife.
This news was like a thunderbolt from the blue, instantly shattering Siqingerile's dream. She was horrified to find that she had become a "little three" and a sinner who destroyed other people's families.
What made Siqingerile even more desperate was that she found out that she was also pregnant. In the face of this hard-won life, she is full of expectations. However, Zang Tianshuo asked her to give up the child unusually calmly.
Siqingerile resolutely refused, but Zang Tianshuo began to become a heavy drinker, and every time she got drunk, he would abuse or abuse her, forcing her to give up the fetus in her womb.
After struggling with pain and despair for a long time, Siqingerile finally chose to give up the child. However, due to missing the best opportunity to "induce labor", she was no longer able to have fertility after this miscarriage.
This decision not only took her life in her womb, but also took away her possibility of becoming a mother again forever.
This emotional experience had a profound impact on Siqingerile. The girl who used to run freely on the vast prairie has now been polished by the grinding of life and has lost her former sharpness and edges.
There was no longer the sparkle of the past in her eyes, replaced by endless sadness and emptiness.
Siqingerile paid a heavy price for this erroneous relationship. After all, the deep love has become an indelible scar in her life. This love puzzle not only robbed her of her first love, but also destroyed her trust in love and expectations for the future.
As the truth of the matter gradually emerges, Siqingerile finds himself losing not only love, but also dignity and reputation. The overwhelming abuse and accusations on the Internet are like sharp knives, stabbing her fragile heart again and again.
The once confident female rock singer has now become inferior and cowardly.
Siqingerile began to have deep doubts about everything about himself. Every time she stands in front of the mirror, she involuntarily falls into self-blame and pain, thinking that she is an out-and-out junior.
The eyes that once shone with the light of dreams are now bloodshot, and their eyes are full of confusion and despair.
In order to escape from reality, Siqingerile began to use wine to drown his sorrows. Alcohol not only paralyzed her nerves, but also magnified the pain inside her. She began to wantonly destroy the belongings in her home, as if to vent her anger and unwillingness in this way.
What was once a vibrant girl is now a soul consumed by alcohol and sadness.
However, reality hits much more than that. One day, Siqingerile met an extreme black fan on the street. The man pointed mercilessly at her nose and spat out the most vicious language, accusing her of moral turpitude and meddling in other people's marriages and destroying family harmony.
Siqingerile stood there, like a sculpture letting the other party's spit splash on his face, but he was powerless to refute it. This face-to-face humiliation made her feel even more helpless and hopeless.
This kind of mental torture made Siqingerile think of suicide many times. She once stood on the roof of a tall building, looking at the traffic below, wanting to jump down to end this painful life.
I also used to hold the blade in the middle of the night and hesitate to my wrist. Luckily, every time a friend caught and stopped her in time.
Just on the verge of a breakdown, her parents rushed to hear the news. The love of parents is like a ray of sunshine, shining into the gloomy heart of Siqingerile.
With her family by her side, she slowly regained the courage to live. However, the road to getting back on your feet remains long and difficult.
This experience was devastating for Siqingerile's musical career. She has appeared on the stage of CCTV Spring Festival Gala four times, and now her status in the rock music industry has plummeted.
The Prairie Eagle, who was once known as "China's first female rock singer", has now become a marginal figure in the music world that no one cares about.
The story of Siqingerile is like a tragic rock movement. It teaches us that there will inevitably be setbacks and betrayals in life, but the important thing is how to maintain the inner strength and move forward in the midst of suffering.
Despite such a devastating blow, Sqingerile struggled to rebuild her life, and this resilience is perhaps her most valuable quality as a rock singer.
When Siqingerile suffered a heavy blow, Zang Tianshuo was not spared. His chaotic private life was made public, and the former rock star instantly became a "scumbag" that everyone shouted at, carrying countless infamy.
However, instead of waking him up, these negative comments seem to inspire him to be more rebellious.
The punishment of fate came quickly and ruthlessly. Zang Tianshuo was arrested by the police on suspicion of organizing a crowd brawl and was eventually sentenced to six years in prison. Living behind bars gave him plenty of time to reflect on what he had done.
After serving his sentence, Zang Tianshuo seems to have changed slightly. He bowed deeply to the fans at a concert to express his gratitude for their long-term support and love.
This act showed many how sincere he was in repentance.
However, just when people thought that Zang Tianshuo might start over, fate hit him mercilessly again. Shortly after that exciting concert, a shocking news came - Zang Tianshuo was diagnosed with advanced liver cancer.
Faced with the threat of death, Zang Tianshuo seems to have finally realized the mistake he had made. In the last moments of his life, he uttered the belated apology to Siqingerile: "I apologize for the initial faults."
This sentence is not only an apology to Siqingerile, but also a confession to all those who have been hurt by him.
Zang Tianshuo's story is, in a way, an allegory of karma. His experience teaches us that everyone is responsible for their actions.
Although he expressed remorse at the last moment of his life, whether this belated apology can make up for the wounds in the hearts of those who were hurt by him, I am afraid that only the person concerned can give an answer.
Time flies, and the turmoil of the past seems to have subsided. However, for Siqingerile, the scars left on her by that experience can never be erased. Now she is no longer the high-spirited female rock singer.
There was a little less sharpness in her eyes, and a little more vicissitudes in her eyes.
Although Siqingerile's music career has not returned to its peak, she has not completely given up her love for music. After Zang Tianshuo's death, she posted a touching song on social media and wrote the words "Brother Zang go well, go all the way".
This may mean that she has begun to let go of that painful memory and choose to face the past with a more tolerant attitude.
Now nearly half a hundred years old, Siqingerile is still alone. Her life may no longer be glorious, but it is calm and uneasy. The girl who used to run freely on the vast grassland has now learned how to move forward strong in the wind and rain of life.
The story of Siqingerile is like a rock music with ups and downs. It teaches us that there will inevitably be setbacks and betrayals in life, but the important thing is how to maintain the inner strength and move forward in the midst of suffering.
Despite the heavy blow, Siqingerile struggled to rebuild her life, a tenacity that is perhaps her most valuable quality as a rock singer.
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