现代大学英语精读第二版（第三册）学习笔记（原文及全文翻译）——6B - They Dared Cocaine—and Lost（尝试可卡因后，他们迷失了）

Unit 6B - They Dared Cocaine—and Lost

They Dared Cocaine—and Lost

Hengry Hurt

A Dream Destroyed

Stan Belin was born in the 1930s to an urban family locked in the grip of the Great Depression. His was a fractured family—one in which his parents fought constantly. "I lived with a feeling of impending doom," he says. This fear drove him to be a model child.

Stan has a vivid memory of once leaning against a bridge railing as a boy and gazing at a handsome party boat passing below. He could see people on deck enjoying their outing. It was a scene of comfort and luxury he could hardly have imagined. That mental picture influenced the boy's idea of success. His goals became money, power, and prestige.

Stan did well in school. He found his greatest academic success in his science courses. But he lacked the confidence to pursue a medical career and turned to dentistry as a quicker route to his life's goals.

He married a young woman he had known since high school, and for over 20 years Stan and Jane lived a life that many people would envy. His reputation spread, the money started rolling in and he was appointed to a prestigious position by his state government. Two healthy children were born. The family had a magnificent house, expensive automobiles and took exotic vacations.

The crowning touch for Stan came when he bought a luxury yacht and sailed to the bridge where, as a child, he had first glimpsed what he hoped would be his future.

"I told Jane the story," he says. "As I spoke, I realized that something was all wrong. I possessed everything I had ever dreamed of, but I felt very sad and hopeless. What was worse, I knew it would never change."

Then in the early 1980s, a doctor friend invited Stan to dinner. The friend said he had been using cocaine as an anti-depressant. He described it as a marvelous nonaddictive drug. Stan decided the drug might be just right for his own depression.

From the instant I snorted the first line of cocaine, I was addicted, says Stan. "It gave me poise, confidence, happiness—things I had believed money should buy. It made me seem a better person, a better talker, a better dentist."

At first Stan did not believe that he was doing anything wrong: "I thought I had finally found an anti-depressant drug that raised me from my misery. It angered me that such a wonderful drug would continue to be outlawed."

Two years after Stan's introduction to cocaine, his insulation from the world of street addiction was knocked asunder when his physician friend was murdered. A week later, Stan walked out of his dental office and never returned. "At the time, I believed I could not deal with the pressures of my practice, but that wasn't it. I just needed more time for my addiction."

He spent his days aimlessly—going shopping with his wife, and wandering from doctor to doctor to find help for his depression—all the while snorting cocaine. He took menial jobs. He frequently considered suicide.

By the third year of Stan's addiction, the effects of cocaine were increasingly fleeting. The high would last for only seconds before he would crash back to the depths of his depression.

Finally, it reached the point where I just stood around crying, Stan says. Jane knew her husband's condition was desperate, and she persuaded him to enter an addiction center. Stan checked into a prominent institution, but he had one-half ounce of cocaine concealed in his clothes. "I was cooperative for a few days, until I had snorted up my cocaine," Stan says. Then he split—as he did other times when Jane convinced him to seek help.

Once when Stan believed he had finally beaten his addiction, he was washing his car and saw a small vial of cocaine, a leftover from his past, roll from beneath the carpet. "Just the sight of it made me high," he recalls. "I put it in my pocket. I thought it would make me stronger to keep it and resist the temptation. But my mind never left that vial."

Like a serpent coiled in Stan's pocket, the little vial of cocaine lay quietly. A war raged in Stan's mind. Then the serpent struck with a ferocity known only to those who are powerless against their addiction. Today Stan has completed an extensive rehabilitation program for his addiction and works as a counselor in a drug program. His salary is one-seventh what he earned as a dentist; his house and boat are gone.

Only time will reveal if he finally has beaten his addiction. Now, as he tries to build his new life, Stan is determined not to let the serpent get so close. (791 words)

Dance Of Death

At the age of 21, Patrick Bissell burst upon New York as principal dancer of the American Ballet Theatre. Rarely had a man so young dazzled so many in the supercharged, intensely competitive world of ballet. He was praised, in the words of Mikhail Baryshnikov, as "one of the brightest lights in the entire ballet world."

Patrick Bissell also helped bury the American myth that ballet is for sissies. At six feet, two inches tall, Patrick was a tough, hard-drinking kid from Texas with a passion for motorcycles, cowboy boots and women. He was a muscle man who could twirl ballerinas into the air and make them look as graceful as butterflies.

Seven months after his birth in 1957, baby Bissell was not walking, according to his mother; he was actually running. When Patrick was ten, his sister bribed him with her allowance to come to her dance class, because she needed a partner. His natural gifts of coordination and stamina were stunning, and from that point on, his destiny was dance.

The ballet world is notoriously brutal in its physical and emotional demands. The primary goal is absolute perfection. Unlike a professional athlete, which many believe Bissell could have become, a ballet star never has the satisfaction of knowing a final score, or of beating the competition. He competes only against himself—and for a perfectionist this may be the harshest competition of all.

When young Bissell set off for life, his mother believes he carried with him seeds that would lead to his destruction. Patrick was one of five children born in six years to Patricia and Donald Bissell, an ambitious young couple who moved six times by the time Patrick was 12.

Patricia Bissell, herself terribly frustrated during those years, is convinced that her son's self-esteem was so battered by her emotional and physical beatings when he was a child that he carried with him a deep-seated hatred of himself. True or not, Patrick Bissell's life seems tormented from the time he was a very young man.

Every indication is that, even early in his career, Bissell was addicted to cocaine, alcohol and other drugs. But his strength and skill were so tremendous that he was able to perform the most demanding work without his managers' knowing the truth.

In her autobiography, Dancing on My Grave, ballerina Gelsey Kirkland claims that Bissell introduced her to cocaine soon after his success in New York City, thus setting their private stage for a long affair of sex and drugs.

She watched Bissell's paranoia grow to the point that, when he slept, he kept a hatchet under the bed and a knife under his pillow. He would stand by the apartment door for hours with a can of Mace to fend off imagined intruders.

In 1981, only three years into his career, Bissell slashed his wrist. When the paramedics reached him, Bissell smashed a bottle to use for a weapon and fought them off. Next day, he was bandaged and back onstage.

By this time, he and Kirkland were clearly out of control—spending weeks on cocaine binges. Increasingly they were absent from rehearsals and late for performances. Both were fired from their jobs, rehired and fired again. In the end, Gelsey Kirkland sought help.

Patrick Bissell did not.

In the fall of 1987, the ballet company sent Bissell away for treatment—to the Betty Ford Center in California. He told friends that he was ready to clear up his life. He wanted a fresh start.

He was released a week early and returned to New York. During December, Amy Rose, a ballerina he had become engaged to, was on tour in California and would return to New York after the holidays. Alone, Bissell got a Christmas tree and decorated it for their apartment.

On December 23, he had a long telephone conversation with his parents. His mother begged him to join them at home. He declined, explaining that being alone during Christmas was a chance for him to show that he was strong enough to live without cocaine.

Four days after Christmas, Amy Rose let herself into the apartment. She discovered Patrick's body on the living-room couch. Patrick Bissell was dead of an overdose of cocaine and other drugs. He had just turned 30.

Patricia Bissell's voice breaks as she speaks of a death notice for her son in The New York Times. Beneath the name Bissell, it simply states: "Good night, sweet prince."

It is impossible to say what, if anything, could have saved Patrick Bissell once he had begun his long dance of death. His mother, realizing that her assessment runs counter to some expert wisdom, offers a powerful insight:

We are quick to blame such tragedies on others—on peer pressure, stressful occupations, drug dealers, everyone except ourselves. But most of these problems begin at home, when children are being brought up. It is hard for me to admit this, but I failed to nurture in Patrick the self-esteem he needed to deal with life. No matter how well he did, he felt that he had failed. He used drugs because they allowed him to escape that feeling. When we come to understand and accept this aspect of addiction, maybe we can do something about it.

参考译文——尝试可卡因后，他们迷失了

尝试可卡因后，他们迷失了

亨利·赫特

破灭的梦

斯坦·贝林于20世纪30年代出生在一个饱受经济大萧条之苦的城市家庭里。这是一个破裂的家庭——他的父母常常无休止地吵架。“我生活中总感觉末日将至。”他说。这种恐惧的心理促使他成了一名模范好孩子。

斯坦还清楚地记得，小时候，有一次他靠在一座桥的栏杆上，出神地望着一艘豪华游艇在桥下驶过。他能看到甲板上的人在尽情地享受着旅游的快乐。那是一种他从来没有想象过的舒适、奢侈的情景。他头脑中的这幅画面影响了他对成功的看法。他的目标变成了追求金钱、权力和名望。

斯坦在学校成绩很好，尤其在理科方面成绩优异，但是他对从事医学缺乏信心，便转向了牙科，把它作为实现自己生活目标的一条捷径。

他与在中学时代就相识的一位女士结了婚，20多年来，斯坦和妻子简过着令许多人羡慕的日子。他声名大噪，财源滚滚，在州政府担任要职，并有了两个健康的孩子。他们拥有了豪华的住宅、昂贵的汽车，还常到国外度假。

斯坦最辉煌的时刻到了，他买了一艘豪华游艇，驶向他儿时第一次瞥见游艇并开始梦想拥有游艇的那座桥下。

“我告诉了简那个故事，”他说，“我说的时候意识到，这一切都错了，我拥有了想要得到的一切东西，但我却感到非常悲哀和无助。更糟糕的是，我清楚这种状况将无法改变。”

后来，80年代初，一位医生朋友请斯坦吃饭。那位朋友说，他一直使用可卡因作为抗忧郁症的药品，他把可卡因描绘为一种神奇的、不会上瘾的药。斯坦觉得，这种药也许适用于自己的忧郁症。

“从我吸食第一口可卡因开始，我就上瘾了，”斯坦说，“可卡因给我安定、信心和幸福的感觉——这些我原来以为应该用金钱才可以买到。它使得我看起来更优秀，更健谈，医疗技术更高明。”

起初，斯坦不相信他在做错事。“我以为终于发现了一种抗忧郁症的药品。它会使我从痛苦中摆脱出来。令我感到气愤的是，这样一种奇妙的药品还被当作违禁品。”

斯坦吸食可卡因两年后，（介绍他吸毒的）医生朋友被谋杀了。从此他和街头的瘾君子之间的隔断被打破了。一个星期以后，斯坦走出他的牙科诊所，再没有回来。“当时，我认为我无法应对来自职业的压力，但是实际上不是这样的。我只是需要更多的时间来满足毒瘾。”

他毫无目的地打发时间——和妻子一起购物、四处登门求医、让医生帮助治疗他的忧郁症——同时还一直在吸食可卡因。他从事着一些不体面的工作，经常想到自杀。

到了斯坦染上毒瘾的第三个年头，可卡因的作用时间变得越来越短。可卡因引起的快感只能持续几秒钟，随后他便重新跌进抑郁的深渊。

“最后，我沦落到随地哭泣的地步。”斯坦说。简明白丈夫已经深处绝境，便劝说他前往戒毒中心。斯坦登记住进了一家有名的戒毒机构，但他在衣服里藏了半盎司可卡因。“开始几天我比较配合，直到我吸食完了带进来的可卡因。”斯坦说。然后他就溜了——以前简让他去寻求医生帮助时他也这样做过。

有一次，斯坦相信自己最终战胜了毒瘾，可是他在清洗汽车的时候，看见了过去吸剩下的一小瓶可卡因从地毯下滚了出来。看见它，我的快感就来了，”他回忆道，“我把它装进口袋。我觉得，保存它并抵御其诱惑会使我坚强起来。但是我的头脑里一直在想着那个小瓶。”

那瓶可卡因像一条蜷伏在斯坦衣袋里的毒蛇一样安静地待在那里。斯坦的头脑中爆发了一场大战。接着毒蛇发起进攻，其凶恶程度只有那些无力抗拒毒瘾的人们才有体会。

如今，斯坦已完成了戒除毒瘾的全面康复计划，并担任一个戒毒项目的咨询指导。他的工资是当牙医时的七分之一，他的住房和游艇也已属于他人。

他能否最终战胜毒瘾，只有让时间来证明。现在，斯坦正在全力打造他的生活，决心不让那条毒蛇再靠近。

死亡之舞

21岁那年，帕特里克·比斯尔突然在纽约名声大噪，成为美国芭蕾舞剧院的领衔舞蹈演员。很少有人在他这样的年纪便在竞争极其激烈的芭蕾舞界征服如此多的观众。米凯亚·巴瑞辛尼科夫称赞他是“整个芭蕾舞界最耀眼的舞蹈明星之一”。

帕特里克·比斯尔也打破了跳芭蕾舞的男子都女里女气的美国式谬论。帕特里克来自得克萨斯州，身高6英尺2英寸，是一个强壮的青年，能喝酒，酷爱摩托车、牛仔靴和女人。他肌肉发达，能将芭蕾舞女演员旋转着抛向空中，使她们像彩蝶一般婀娜多姿。

据比斯尔的母亲讲述，1957年，在出生后仅7个月的时候，婴儿比斯尔不是在走，实际上已经会跑了。他10岁那年，姐姐用零花钱哄他陪自己去舞蹈班学习，因为她需要个舞伴。他那与生倶来的协调力与耐力令人惊讶，从那时起，他就与舞蹈结下了不解之缘。

芭蕾舞对体力和情感的要求很苛刻，这是出了名的，而绝对完美是其首要目标。许多人认为比斯尔本应成为一名职业运动员，而芭蕾舞明星与运动员不同，永远不能通过知晓最终比赛结果或在竞争中获胜而获得满足感。他只和自己竞争——对于一个完美主义者来说，这可能是最严酷的竞争。

比斯尔的母亲认为，从他离家奋斗开始，他就埋下了会导致其毁灭的种子。帕特里克是帕特里夏和唐纳德·比斯尔在6年里生下的5个孩子中的一个，到帕特里克12岁时，这一对雄心勃勃的年轻夫妇已搬迁了6次。

帕特里夏·比斯尔本人在那些年里深受挫折，她深信儿子的自尊心在童年时就由于她对其身心的打击而受到了伤害，他因此对自身有一种根深蒂固的仇恨。不管她说的是否属实，帕特里克·比斯尔似乎自童年起生活就受到了困扰。

各种迹象表明，甚至，在比斯尔舞蹈生涯的初期，他就已对可卡因、酒精和其他毒品产生了依赖。但是他的力量和技艺超人，总能够完成要求最严格苛刻的表演，而他的经理人却不知晓任何实情。

女芭蕾舞演员格尔西·柯克兰在其自传《坟墓上的舞蹈》中声称，比斯尔在纽约市一举成名后不久，便诱使她吸食了可卡因，从此他们之间保持着长期的性关系，并共同吸食毒品。

她注意到比斯尔的妄想症加剧。在他睡觉时，床下放着一把短柄手斧，枕下放着一把刀。他还常常一连几个小时站在公寓房门旁，手里拿着一罐催泪瓦斯，准备抵御想象中的闯入者。

1981年，这是比斯尔的事业刚刚开始的第三年，他割腕了。当医护人员走近他时，他打碎了一只瓶子当作武器，把他们赶走了。第二天，他扎着绷带回到了舞台上。

到这时，他和柯克兰显然已无法自拔——连续几个星期都在狂吸可卡因。他们不参加排练，演出迟到，并且次数越来越多。两人都被解雇了，之后得到重新聘用，又再次被解雇。格尔西·柯克兰最终寻求了帮助。

帕特里克·比斯尔却没有这样做。

1987年秋天，芭蕾舞公司送比斯尔去治疗——到加利福尼亚州的贝蒂福特中心。他告诉朋友们，他准备戒毒，想重新开始生活。

他提前一星期就被放了出来，回到了纽约。12月，与他订婚的女芭蕾舞演员埃米·罗斯去加利福尼亚州旅行，并将在假期结束后回到纽约。于是比斯尔独自一人去买了一棵圣诞树，将公寓装饰起来。

12月23日，他和父母进行了电话长谈。母亲恳求他回家一块过节，但他拒绝了。他解释说，一个人的圣诞节使他有机会证明自己已经十分坚强，离开可卡因也可以生活下去。

圣诞节后的第四天，埃米·罗斯走进公寓，在起居室的沙发上发现了帕特里克的尸体。帕特里克·比斯尔死于过量吸食可卡因和其他毒品。他年仅30岁。

帕特里夏·比斯尔在提到《纽约时报》上有关她儿子的讣告时泣不成声。在比斯尔的名字下，讣告上简单地写着：晚安，可爱的芭蕾王子。

我们也不能断定在帕特里克·比斯尔开始他漫长的死亡之舞时，还有什么能够挽救他。他母亲觉得自己的看法与某些专家相悖，于是发表了她深刻而有力的见解：

“我们急于把此类悲剧归咎给他人——归罪给同辈的压力、压力大的职业、毒品贩子，埋怨每个人，就是不愿意责怪自身。可是这些问题大多起源于家庭，起源于孩子的成长过程。我很难承认这一点，但是我确实没能在儿子身上培养他面对生活的自尊。无论他曾经表现得如何出色，他总是觉得自己失败了。他吸食毒品，因为毒品能使他逃避这种感觉。当我们渐渐了解并接受他吸毒成瘾的原因时，也许有些事是我们可以做的。”

Key Words:

exotic      [eg'zɔtik]

adj. 异国的，外来的，奇异的，脱衣舞的

vivid ['vivid]   

adj. 生动的，鲜艳的，栩栩如生的

prestige  [pres'ti:ʒ]

n. 威望，声望

luxury     ['lʌkʃəri] 

n. 奢侈，豪华，奢侈品

outing    ['autiŋ]   

n. 郊游，远足，外出

depression     [di'preʃən]     

n. 沮丧，萧条

impending     [im'pendiŋ]   

adj. 逼迫的，迫切的，即将发生的 动词impend的

scene      [si:n]

n. 场，景，情景

academic       [.ækə'demik] 

adj. 学术的，学院的，理论的

reputation      [.repju'teiʃən] 

n. 声誉，好名声

dentist    ['dentist]

n. 牙科医生

misery    ['mizəri]  

n. 痛苦，悲惨的境遇，苦难

spoke     [spəuk]  

v. 说，说话，演说

marvelous     ['mɑ:viləs]     

adj. 令人惊异的，了不起的，不平常的

confidence     ['kɔnfidəns]   

adj. 骗得信任的

n. 信任，信心，把握

physician [fi'ziʃən]  

n. 内科医生

depression     [di'preʃən]     

n. 沮丧，萧条

poise      [pɔiz]     

n. 平衡，姿势，镇静，悬空 vt. 使 ... 平衡，

addiction [ə'dikʃən]     

n. 沉溺，上瘾

resist      [ri'zist]    

v. 抵抗，反抗，抵制，忍住

n. 防蚀涂层

concealed      [kən'si:ld]

adj. 隐蔽的，隐匿的

menial    ['mi:niəl] 

adj. 适合仆人做的，卑微的 n. 佣人，家仆，卑贱的

ferocity   [fə'rɔsiti] 

n. 凶猛性，残忍性，狂暴的行为

desperate      ['despərit]      

adj. 绝望的，不顾一切的

convinced      [kən'vinst]     

adj. 信服的

institution      [.insti'tju:ʃən] 

n. 机构，制度，创立

fleeting   ['fli:tiŋ]   

adj. 飞逝的(疾驰的，短暂的，急走的)

split [split]     

n. 劈开，裂片，裂口

extensive [iks'tensiv]     

adj. 广泛的，广阔的，广大的

dazzled         

adj. 目眩的；眼花撩乱的 v. （使）眼花（dazz

dentist    ['dentist]

n. 牙科医生

rehabilitation  [.ri:hə.bili'teiʃən]    

n. 复原

reveal     [ri'vi:l]    

vt. 显示，透露

n. (外墙与门或窗之间的

myth      [miθ]     

n. 神话

partner   ['pɑ:tnə] 

n. 搭档，伙伴，合伙人

v. 同 ... 合

competitive    [kəm'petitiv]  

adj. 竞争的，比赛的

graceful  ['greisfəl]

adj. 优雅的

coordination  [kəu'ɔ:di'neiʃən]    

n. 协调

perfection      [pə'fekʃən]     

n. 完美，完善

grave      [greiv]    

n. 坟墓，墓穴

adj. 严肃的，严重的，庄

autobiography      [.ɔ:təbai'ɔgrəfi]      

n. 自传

destruction    [di'strʌkʃən]   

n. 破坏，毁灭，破坏者

indication       [.indi'keiʃən]  

n. 表示，指示，象征

brutal     ['bru:tl]   

adj. 野蛮的，残暴的

athlete    ['æθli:t]  

n. 运动员

primary  ['praiməri]     

adj. 主要的，初期的，根本的，初等教育的

ambitious      [æm'biʃəs]    

adj. 有雄心的，有抱负的，野心勃勃的

perform  [pə'fɔ:m] 

v. 执行，运转，举行，表演

engaged [in'geidʒd]     

adj. 忙碌的，使用中的，订婚了的

control    [kən'trəul]      

n. 克制，控制，管制，操作装置

vt. 控制

ballet      ['bælei]  

n. 芭蕾舞

conversation  [.kɔnvə'seiʃən]

n. 会话，谈话

mace      [meis]    

n. 钉头槌，狼牙棒 n. 权标，执权标者 vt. 向

onstage  ['ɔn'steidʒ, 'ɔ:n-]   

adj. 台上的；台上演出的 adv. 上台；上场

wrist [rist]

n. 手腕，护腕

paranoia [.pærə'nɔiə]   

n. 偏执狂，妄想狂

understand    [.ʌndə'stænd]

vt. 理解，懂，听说，获悉，将 ... 理解为，认为<

nurture   ['nə:tʃə]  

n. 养育，照顾，教育，滋养，营养品

pressure ['preʃə]   

n. 压力，压强，压迫

v. 施压

except     [ik'sept]  

vt. 除，除外

prep. & conj.

stressful  ['stresfəl]

adj. 紧张的，压力重的

addiction [ə'dikʃən]

n. 沉溺，上瘾

impossible     [im'pɔsəbl]    

adj. 不可能的，做不到的

escape    [is'keip]  

v. 逃跑，逃脱，避开

n. 逃跑，逃脱，(逃

insight    ['insait]   

n. 洞察力

blame     [bleim]   

n. 过失，责备

参考资料：

1. 现代大学英语精读(第2版)第三册:U6B They Dared Cocaine--and Lost(1)_大学教材听力 - 可可英语
2. 现代大学英语精读(第2版)第三册:U6B They Dared Cocaine--and Lost(2)_大学教材听力 - 可可英语
3. http://www.kekenet.com/daxue/201704/50172shtml
4. http://www.kekenet.com/daxue/201704/50172shtml
5. 现代大学英语精读(第2版)第三册:U6B They Dared Cocaine--and Lost(5)_大学教材听力 - 可可英语
6. 现代大学英语精读(第2版)第三册:U6B They Dared Cocaine--and Lost(6)_大学教材听力 - 可可英语

现代大学英语精读(第2版)第三册:U6B They Dared Cocaine--and Lost(7)_大学教材听力 - 可可英语