I have been in France for 17 years, my husband is a senior executive of a multinational company, has two mixed-race babies, and has his own business

Interviews with real people

2024-06-30 10:54

This is the 4,150th real story we have told

I'm Li Hui and I'm from Pingxiang, Jiangxi.

At the age of 20, I couldn't stand the same life, and I was bent on changing the status quo, so I made a decision that left no way out for myself. At the age of 21, I realized my wish and thought that I could see the world without worries, but the truth was a slap in the face, and the pressure followed.

Who would have thought that later, I would join a multinational company, and what is even more surprising is that there, I met someone who has been with me for a lifetime. Today, we raise two mixed-race babies, and our miracles are still happening.

(I'm in France)

In 1986, I was born in an ordinary family in Pingxiang, Jiangxi. Dad is an employee of the power supply company. Mom is a worker. I am the only child in my family.

My family belongs to a traditional Chinese family, and my parents are very strict with my education, so my academic performance has been very good since I was a child, and I was at the top of my class from elementary school to junior high school, and I properly belonged to other people's children.

Although I have been growing up in a demanding educational environment and graduating from school on a regular basis, I am an outgoing and adventurous person, always eager to live my life according to my own ideas.

After graduating from junior high school, I was successfully admitted to a local high school. In high school, I relaxed a little in my studies, and my grades slipped to average. In the end, during the college entrance examination, I was only admitted to a second-class university in Shenyang to study engineering machinery.

Although the school is average, I am still very happy to attend. I thought I could finally break away from the control of my family and study and live according to my own wishes.

But it wasn't long before I found that college life felt like another high school, which made me feel frustrated. After two years of unchanging life, my patience exploded.

(At the age of 21, I came to France alone)

I feel that I am only 20 years old, and there are infinite possibilities in the future, and I can't just graduate, get married, and spend my whole life without panic. I want to go outside and see the bigger world.

So, in 2006, in my third year of college, I made the bold decision to drop out and study abroad.

I found out that France is free to study abroad, so I chose to go to France. So, I lied to my parents, went through the withdrawal procedures directly, and set out to do two things, one was to find an agent to make study abroad materials, and the other was to find a language school to learn French.

In this way, on the one hand, I directly applied to a university in France by transferring credits. On the one hand, I started to learn French. At that time, because I was a zero-based learner, in order to meet the language requirements as soon as possible, 24 hours a day, in addition to eating, I basically even slept and dreamed of words.

After half a year of studying in the dark, I finally passed the embassy's language exam.

(Wild ducks by the Seine)

In this process, I put in more effort than others. Because, dropping out of school means that I am in a ship, and there is no way back but to try to move forward. French is actually very difficult to learn, and I still have no prior knowledge. Later, I had to handle visas, interviews, and specific enrollment matters, and I had to do everything myself.

After a year of preparation, in 2007, I went to the University of Caen in France on my own. The university is located in Normandy, France, close to Paris, but the level of consumption is much lower than Paris, which is suitable for students like me who come from a working family.

That year, I was 21 years old and went abroad for the first time. Due to my personality, I am different from most Chinese students and like to hang out with my own people. I love to make friends, I'm curious about everything, and I quickly settled into my new environment.

Later, I heard that the city government has a program to help international students integrate into life in France.

So, I went straight to the municipality for help and signed up for the program. I found a very nice family at that time. In just a week, I was really immersed in the lives of the locals in France.

(I'm by the Seine)

My host family belongs to the middle class of France, and the old couple is retired at home, hoping to understand Chinese culture and achieve the purpose of mutual exchange through this kind of program, and we hit it off.

They were very nice to me, and every weekend, the man would pick me up and take me to his house for dinner, and he would make the meal himself and talk about the French food culture. They invited me to their homes on major holidays, took me to French weddings, and even took me on trips. For the first time, I felt the joy of being at home.

There are many people who think that I am always with foreigners, some of whom are flattering, but I don't care about other people's voices, this is just a means for me to integrate into French society.

My main pressure still comes from studying, in the first year of university, I mainly studied languages, I only studied French for half a year before I came, although I passed the exam, but when I actually communicated, the speed of speech was too fast, and I still couldn't understand. I can only learn and practice at the same time, and slowly improve my language level.

A year later, I started to study professional courses, and I once again started listening to heavenly books.

(Diploma certificate I obtained)

I studied engineering mechanics in my country, and because of translation, I chose a completely unfamiliar major, which caused me to not understand anything in class.

The exam here is also different from that in China, there are no multiple-choice questions, true/false questions and other question types, and there are only two or three big questions, but you need to use the knowledge of the entire subject to answer. Classes are also divided into large classes, laboratory classes, and exercise classes.

For a while, I felt very stressed, but I understood that it was not easy for me to get to this point. I have heard a saying, "How can you see a rainbow without going through tribulations, and when you encounter difficulties, if you don't retreat and don't give in, you won't lose to yourself." "I think so.

In 2009, I successfully graduated from my bachelor's degree and continued my graduate studies at the university. In 2011, he also graduated successfully.

The elimination rate of French universities is 50%, and nearly half of the students fail to graduate every year and need to repeat or drop out. There is a large number of students who will eliminate the diversion and do technical work. I was able to graduate twice, and it took a lot more effort than the average person.

Until now, I am grateful to myself for my hard work at the beginning, and it is because of the unremitting efforts of the past that I have achieved the current self.

(I started a trading company)

At the beginning of 2012, I was looking for a job in Paris and was frustrated. Unemployment in France is high, not to mention that I'm still a foreigner. In France, if someone hires a foreigner, the employer has to pay a large tax in order to be approved by the Labor Department. Therefore, you can only get your dream job if you are better than the French.

The difficult employment environment led to the extremely difficult process of finding a job, and in the whole nine months, I submitted a lot of materials and resumes, all of which were in vain, even if there was an occasional reply, I was waiting for news.

At that time, my visa was about to expire and I had to return to my country if I hadn't found a job yet. It was a breakdown for me.

However, just as I was about to give up, I unexpectedly received an interview invitation from a company in the oil industry, which was headquartered in Ireland and had a branch office in Paris. The sudden invitation made me excited.

However, the position required by the company was to do the calculation of the pipeline structure for oil seabed extraction, and I was a complete layman in this area, which instantly extinguished my hopes.

In the end, I participated in the first round of interviews with an attitude of being at ease, but I didn't expect to pass.

(I'm with my friends)

Then I went to the second round of interviews in Ireland, and this time I still didn't have any hope, so I went without any pressure. Maybe it was my relaxed mind that made me play particularly well, and this time I actually passed it again.

I was so surprised and curious. Unexpectedly, I was the last person in the class to find a job, but I became the best one.

Summing up my experience of looking for a job, I have had countless interviews in nine months, and although there are no results, I have inadvertently accumulated a lot of interview experience.

It can be seen that there is no road in vain in life, and every step counts. This made me even more convinced that even though a person has experienced countless failures and countless rejections, as long as he never gives up, he will definitely achieve what he wants.

In 2012, I officially started working for this global multinational oil company. After joining the company, I attended training at the headquarters in Ireland and also traveled to various European countries, accumulating valuable international work experience. Most importantly, I met people who have been with me all my life at this company.

At that time, my ex-boyfriend and I had just broken up, and it was the darkest moment of my life to find a job and frustration one after another.

(My two mixed-race babies)

I met him when I first joined the company. He was originally a colleague of mine, his personal resume is very good, he has a good academic performance since he was a child, he aspires to be a pilot, he began to learn to fly in his teens, and he got a pilot's license at the age of eighteen. Attend one of the top 10 engineering schools in France. Later, only because of slight color blindness, the dream of a pilot was not realized. That's why he came to work in the company and became a colleague with me.

His family is the same as the traditional Chinese family, with the male head outside and the female head inside, and his parents' education is strict and warm. Therefore, his cultural background and family education are very similar to mine.

As colleagues, we have a good impression of each other in our daily interactions. Although the company does not allow employees to fall in love with each other, we still sneak together.

In 2013, we got married. The following year, crude oil prices fell and the entire oil industry went into a slump.

At that time, I thought that I would not be able to work as an engineer here for the rest of my life, so I planned for the future in advance, and at that time, I worked part-time as a purchasing agent, and accumulated a lot of business experience and customers.

(I'm at the gym)

In 2015, I happened to be pregnant again. So, I quit my job and started my own business, starting an import and export trading company with a friend, mainly dealing in wine import and export. So far, it's been nine years.

Looking back on the past, since I was a child, I was under the strict control of my parents, which stimulated the rebellious factor in my bones. And because I grew up in a small city, I wanted to go out and see the bigger world. So much so, when I grew up, I dropped out of school desperately, went abroad, and pursued the life I wanted.

I admire my courage when I was young, I don't admit defeat, and I am so strong. Obviously, I can change my fate by external forces, but I don't. For so many years, I have studied, worked, and started a business in France, and I have suffered a lot along the way, but they have not defeated me, and they have only made me stronger.

Therefore, I am very grateful for my reckless courage and the spirit of striving for progress in order to achieve my goals. I feel that I have a lot of strengths, I am capable, I have a diploma, I have a good character, I have a reliable character, and I am also very kind. I firmly believe that God has always been fair and will give the best reward to people for their hard work and kindness.

Now, I have my own gym in Paris and am now profitable. My husband is an executive in another global multinational company. I also have two mixed-race babies, the older one is eight years old and the younger is five years old.

When it comes to educating children, I hope that they will not live in a rigid and serious environment like I did when I was a child, and that they will be able to freely express their preferences and ideas.

Therefore, I never give a chicken baby and do not force them to do what they don't want to do. As long as they like something, I will definitely give it my full support. In my opinion, the most important thing is for children to have a happy childhood.

In the future, I will focus on trade, gyms and other aspects of development, as for whether I can make money, it is not the most important thing, life should be based on happiness. I believe that as long as there is sunshine in the eyes and a smile full of openness, the future will be full of good years.

[Dictation: Li Hui]

[Written by: Cloud Moon]

[Editor: Wuxi Wu]

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(*This article is based on the oral statements of the parties, and the authenticity is the responsibility of the oral narrator.) Friendly reminder from this account: Please identify the relevant risks by yourself, and do not blindly follow the trend to make impulsive decisions. ）

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Personal opinion, for reference only