After watching the top students with a score of 680 or more, I found that their families all have such a common background......

New Oriental Family Education

2024-06-28 09:29Creator in the field of parenting

The full text is 2732 words, and it takes about 8 minutes to read

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01 The families of high-scoring students generally have a relaxed and free family atmosphere, so that children can work hard without distractions.

02 Parents are emotionally relaxed, and children have a sense of security, which is conducive to cultivating children's self-confidence and sunshine mentality.

03A good parent-child relationship can allow children to focus on learning without internal friction.

04To this end, parents should overcome anxiety, maintain a calm mind, and give their children enough love and support.

05In general, a relaxed and free family atmosphere is conducive to the healthy growth of children.

Technical support is provided by Tencent Hybrid Model

Author: The main creative group, Little Tomato

In recent days, the results of the college entrance examination have been released one after another.

Many top students who have obtained high scores have also swiped the Internet.

Chen Xiaoyu, a science bully from Inner Mongolia, scored 710 points, 30 points higher than his estimate, especially in mathematics, and got an astonishing 148.5 points, close to a full score.

When asked what kind of "secret" there is to achieve such results, Chen Xiaoyu said:

Achieving such results by yourself is not a blind hard study, nor an endless "sea of questions tactics", but depends on a good attitude.

In the three years of high school, no matter when, he was able to "have no distractions" and maintain inner peace and self-confidence.

He also has many hobbies in his daily life, such as table tennis, playing Go and so on.

And he can be so relaxed and peaceful, which is inseparable from the long-term nourishment and encouragement of his parents behind him.

In the past few days, I have studied the family education of many high-scoring students in recent years, and I was surprised to find:

Many parents of excellent students will not work too education, but learn to loosen their children and give them a sense of relaxation from the inside out.

This sense of relaxation is the secret behind many excellent children.

The family atmosphere is relaxed

Your child is calm and confident

Have you noticed that throughout the college entrance examination every year, they are not dead children.

On the contrary, no matter how busy they are with their studies, they will stick to their hobbies and hobbies, and they are usually quite good at playing.

And this is inseparable from the relaxed family atmosphere created by the parents of these school tyrants.

Meng Linghao, a 711-point student from Shandong, has had a particularly democratic and free family atmosphere since he was a child.

His parents didn't have any hard requirements for his studies, and they didn't force him to attend any subject tutorial classes.

He began to like playing the cello in elementary school, and many children who studied art were forced by their parents to give up their art hobby because of their unstable grades.

But Meng Linghao's parents always respected and supported his choice, which allowed him to take care of his studies and interests, stabilize his mentality, and finally counterattack.

A relaxed and free growth environment will allow children to relax physically and mentally, devote themselves to learning comfortably, and maintain an optimistic attitude.

Zhu Kehang, a scholar from Zhejiang, was on the hot search because he won the Guo Moruo Scholarship.

He has loved to play since he was a child, from ice skating, skateboarding, Rubik's cube...... To the Three Kingdoms Kill, the Four Kingdoms War.

His parents not only did not stop him, but allowed him to invite a bunch of friends to the house to play together;

Zhu Kehang, who loves to play and study all the way, not only successfully entered the University of Science and Technology of China, but also got a full award direct doctoral offer from 9 prestigious universities when he graduated......

There is also Ding Runyang, the champion of liberal arts in the Jiangsu Provincial College Entrance Examination, who loves to play Go since he was a child and is a "Go amateur five-dan" player.

Playing Go has cultivated his strong ability to resist frustration and correct gain and loss, allowing him to maintain a normal mind during exams.

Therefore, I especially recommend that parents allow or even cultivate some hobbies in their children, such as musical instruments, drawing, photography, sports, etc.

This can help children to reduce stress, relax and find joy in life through hobbies after intense studying.

Only by creating a relaxed and free family background can children work hard without distractions, develop freely, and grow up confident and sunny.

Parents are emotionally relaxed

The child has a sense of security

A friend who has been a junior high school homeroom teacher for more than ten years told an example of "the fall of a school bully".

That child was originally excellent in academics and served as a school committee member for several years in succession.

It's a pity that his parents have a very bad temper, every time they see his grades drop, they either beat him or scold, and even ridicule him in front of others, scolding him for being stupid like a pig.

Living in a family environment full of anger for a long time, the child becomes very irritable, impatient, and talks back to the teacher, and his grades are getting worse and worse.

The Chinese Academy of Education Sciences once conducted a survey: which family factors have a greater impact on children's performance?

The results showed that the more positive the parents' emotions, the higher the proportion of children with excellent grades.

Gu Ailing's mother Gu Yan is an emotionally stable and positive person.

What her friends said about her was:

You rarely hear her (Gu Yan) complain, she always says "this thing is good, you go and do it". When you're with her, you're always laughing, and she's going to make everything funny.

Every time her daughter was sick or injured, she was very calm and calm.

When her daughter encountered setbacks in her growth, she always smiled and encouraged her and hugged her.

Under the influence of her mother, Gu Ailing has a very positive and sunny personality, is particularly resistant to frustration, and has a very strong heart.

In psychology, there is a concept called "emotional container", and a good parent should be a child's emotional container.

When a child's anxiety, fear, and anger are released, parents need to be able to catch it, and then transform it into lightness, warmth, and strength.

Zhao Qichen, a Ningbo boy who was admitted to Tsinghua University with a score of 705 in the college entrance examination, once said that his mother had a great influence on him.

He was full of gratitude when he spoke of his mother:

"My mom never scolded me for my unsatisfactory grades, and she always encouraged me and supported me when I was confused and lost."

As the child grows up, no matter how the child behaves, parents should be positive and optimistic and maintain a positive and stable mood.

Parents' emotions are as relaxed as water, so that they can nourish their children's hearts like a trickle, so that she has enough sense of security and confidence.

In order to devote himself to study and life without hesitation.

Parent-child relationship is lax

The child does not have internal friction

A counselor told a story:

A father brought his son in the third year of junior high school to ask him for help, saying that he was in the critical period of his education, but he was extremely rebellious.

He didn't write homework every day, followed his classmates to skip class and surf the Internet, and he beat and scolded and scolded, but to no avail.

The son finally couldn't bear it anymore and began to accuse his father of all kinds of wrongs:

"You're all about making money, and you can go home a few times a month......

Parent-teacher meeting, other classmates' parents are here, where are you?

When I was first in junior high school and I was bullied by others, did you care about me?

At that moment, the father was speechless.

The counselor couldn't help but sigh: "Whether it is a child's behavior problems or emotional problems, many of them are relationship problems. ”

If the parent-child relationship is very tense, there will be a confrontation in the family, so that the child will be deeply anxious, nervous, and internal friction for a long time.

Last year, Yuan Shuai, a student from Chengdu, Sichuan, scored 711 points in science.

Yuan Shuai's mother once suggested in an interview that parents should be friends with their children and have a good parent-child relationship.

When Yuan Shuai was in the first year of junior high school, because he was in the rebellious period of youth, he got along with his mother a little stiffly.

In order to get closer to her child, she chose to start with her son's favorite game and began to play Honor of Kings.

There are also twin brothers from Changsha, Hunan, who scored 688 points in the college entrance examination at the same time.

Their parents have said in interviews that the couple are very busy with work, but they still try to find time to spend with their children.

Moreover, they carefully observed that both children are very sensitive and require extra care from their parents.

Therefore, they do their best to give their children timely emotional support and maintain a good parent-child relationship with their children.

Only in this way can the child be free of distractions and devote all his energy to learning.

Without a good parent-child relationship, all education is equal to zero.

Parents should usually give their children more company, understand more about what their children like and think, and provide emotional support in a timely manner, so as to continuously nourish their children's hearts.

Parents are relaxed

The child is optimistic and positive

In "The Ununderstood Boy", there is a 6th grade girl named NG.

Not only was she depressed and self-harmed, but she also committed suicide.

For a long time, her mother has a sick obsession with her grades.

After each test, many parents will go around communicating about how many points their children have scored, and NG's mother will come back and say, "I don't dare to say that you have scored so much." ”

NG usually gets snubbed and abused by his parents as long as he plays with his mobile phone or his grades drop.

She and her mother often broke out into arguments, and once the two quarreled so badly that NG jumped from the third floor in a fit of rage, but fortunately a passerby caught her, and she was only slightly injured.

According to the China Youth Development Report, about 30 million children and adolescents under the age of 17 in mainland China suffer from various emotional disorders and behavioral problems.

In today's involution environment, many parents have high hopes for their children, and their children are burdened with heavy pressure.

But they ignore that children are likely to be depressed by daily anxiety and internal friction.

The more parents want their children to win, the more they should overcome their anxiety and maintain a relaxed and stable state of mind.

Meng Linghao's grades have always been average before high school, but his parents never criticize him, they are all encouraging and guiding.

"Even if I failed the exam, I was always comforted."

Some time ago, I was particularly moved when I saw such a hot search.

A mother found that her daughter was under too much pressure in her third year of high school, so she tried all kinds of ways to make her daughter happy.

She also deliberately bought a marshmallow machine on the Internet, accompanied her daughter to skip class for a night of self-study, and let her daughter make marshmallows by herself.

That night, my daughter finally had a carefree smile on her face.

If the strings in the child's heart are pulled too tightly, they will break one day.

Really smart parents have already done it, anti-anxiety, anti-involution, and anti-internal friction.

In this way, children can be given enough comfortable freedom and space to move forward steadily, and their hearts are full of energy.

Song Qingling once said: Children's personality and talents are, in the final analysis, influenced by their families and parents.

The college entrance examination is a marathon for children that lasts for a long time and constantly challenges themselves;

For parents, it is not a protracted battle that tests wisdom and patience.

Only by being a pair of relaxed parents, cultivating mentality, emotional stability, and giving children real care and love can they illuminate the way forward for their children.

I hope that all children can ride the wind and waves in the coming day and make their dreams come true in a warm and relaxed family atmosphere.

Click "watching" and encourage everyone.

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